My least favourite was my company motto of “Personal, Simple, Brilliant.” It was supposed to be an ethos that ran through the whole company. It was actually just what management expected front line workers to be towards customers, regardless of whether the business leaders were making decisions to screw over the customer and the front line staff or not.
The amount of times I asked for support only to be shot down and laughed at when I told them “Well, that doesn’t sound very personal, simple or brilliant to me.” when speaking of their management culture.
I’m fucking mad that I hear many of these every day and ENGLISH IS NOT MY FUCKING MOTHERTONGUE YOU FUCKING FUCKS
Same, but to be honest… attempts to migrate some words to your own language can also get very awkward.
For some unknown reason the phrase “thought leader” drives me crazy.
How do you feel about “Leading thought leader”? 🤮
what are “new verticals”? do i even want to know?
They are opportunities for increasing shareholder value through innovative and disruptive market-leading practices.
I mean not necessarily, they could just be ways to expand profit centers by increasing pipeline opportunities through net new MQLs
🤢🤮
Agile and synergize aligned itself into this chat.
look at this guy being proactive
It’s interoperable, baby. It’s how we get to “done” by energising ourselves, being more agile, adapting to new models, and advocating on behalf of–
Okay, I can’t do anymore I’m repulsed.
I hate you for writing that. I hate that those words are present in my daily work life. Fuck corporate language.
I cannot tell you how many bosses Ive had/ heard say they are going to have a moment of “radical kindness” and then proceed to just RIP into their employees until they cry.
Corporate double speak is wack.
This sounds quite specific for something you had to experience multiple times. Hope the people are ok and you found something better to work for.
I’m in full swing of a job search and I painfully relate to this image
No way, this is a great reference chart. All the actionables have been curated into one place.
We’ll circle back to this next week.
With actionable deliverables
To move the needle
Alternative title how you know you need to find another place to work
The one I hate most: “Art of the Possible”.
Makes me wanna logout life
Self-uninstall
Unsafely eject drive
Grit. I worked at a massive tech company that found this one and it was fucking everywhere. I don’t mind the basic concept of it, but it was just in every conversation for like 2+ years.
To be fair, Game Changer was a great strain. Very creative, me an a bud enjoyed some an launched into DND world building for an hour an a half
This shit makes me want to start a cult in the woods so I can live completely isolated from corporate culture bullshit
