Luke at 23 - Jedi Master
Anakin at 23 - Not a Jedi Master
Sith lord, jedi master, tomayto, tomawto
Apprentice* Sith Lord
Assistant to the Sith Lord.
And he has his own secret Assistant to the assistant to the Sith Lord
As is tradition
If they were to bring Starkiller into modern Star Wars I would be so happy.
the only character I wanna see in Star Wars, is Darth Schrute
The Sith Lord’s
rightleft hand.
On the other hand, he didn’t get two of his limbs chopped off and end up thrown into a pit of lava a short time later, requiring him to spend the rest of his life in an armored suit. So maybe the incest was worth it?
So maybe the incest was worth it
-FlyingSquid, 2023
Look at Darth Vader. I stand by my statement.
That just activated a long supressed and forgotten part of gaming history. At one point in Final Fantasy XI, you could get a really powerful sword from a dragon. Someone once asked “Would you fuck your sister for a Ridill”. Not everyone said no… I might be getting the phrasing of the question wrong since it was 10+ years ago. I tried googling but nothing came up.
If porn is any gage, a lot would fuck their sister for free.
I could be wrong, but I read someone else’s comment years ago that said the suit was like that on purpose and it was a way for the emperor to control him or something.
Anyway, that might not even be canon even if it’s in some book or game.
It’s canon. The suit was purposefully made in a very flawed way, so that Vader would have a difficult time winning a battle against Sidious. Even in his crippled state, Vader was a major threat. Also, it’s not entirely clear why it happens in-universe, but Vader’s burnt body was supposed to heal over time, yet it never did - not until Luke brought back a spark of goodness in his heart.
Number of younglings slain:
Luke - 0
Anakin - NumerousAre we absolutely sure there were no kids on the deathstar?
Fair point, but… why would they lol
The Death Star was huge, I’m sure people fucked and made babies on it. I doubt they would just let people leave the Death Star to go raise their kids. That either means kids were just ejected into space, or they were raised on the Death Star.
Given Darth Vader’s history with children, it’s not unlikely that he just said “fuck them kids” and had them yeeted, but it’s funnier to imagine a Death Star Day Care, so imma go with that as my head canon.
Edit: you guys are coming up with some valid counterpoints, but my head canon is still funnier, so I’m sticking with it.
I was in a band called Death Star Daycare. We mostly did Nina Hagen covers.
I was in a band called Death Star Daycare.
That’s, actually, not bad, at all.
Although I’m sure the Disney attorneys would probably have some issues with that name, potentially.
I mean, he was also a Jedi, so separating kids from their parents is pretty par for the course. Maybe they were simply sent off to Empire
training campboarding school.Yeah but Luke sorted a lot of that out, oh wait.
You can bet genetic engineering has reached a level where you can sterilize your whole army without a concern.
So soldiers fucking like rabbits ? Maybe. All genders ? Maybe, we have no idea whether there were women onboard. BUt did they get pregnant ? Why bother ?
Ok, so how many underdeveloped soldiers in test tubes were on that thing?
That’s a good point.
“Master Skywalker, there are too many of them. What are we going to do?”
“We’re gonna SIIING!”
Luke at 22: Jedi Master
Anakin at 22: …
Bet Anakin had power converters, though.
Luke at 22: Blew up the Death Star
Kinda big thing to not include
I think he was 19 when he blew up the Death Star. 22 when he kissed Leia in ESB which I believe takes place 2 years after A New Hope.
2 years after A New Hope.
20,21…22
Erm
Math is not strong with this one.
It’s not lol
But I did look it up and ESB takes place in 3ABY which is 3 years after A New Hope.
Still possible. Not like either of the movies happened on his birthday so he could’ve been almost 20 and ESB occurred just over 2 years after.
Guys can we please not make comparisons like this? Everybody is on their own life journey at their own pace. Anakin was taken in to be the apprentice of a great Jedi master when he was but a wee lad, luke had no opportunities beyond farming dirt and constructing additional pylons with his aunt and uncle well into adulthood.
These types of comparisons are unfair and unhealthy and promote unrealistic expectations on young impressionable minds.
I asked Luke Skywalker and he said he is okay with this meme. Oddly, I couldn’t get in touch with his father.
Tbf, they both made out with a princess, and while Anakin mostly farmed bots for exp Luke’s actual KDA was amazing.
Did the death star have a daycare? If so, he got anakin beat on younglings slaughtered too.
I don’t think so. The Death Star was a military vessel, and spouses/children don’t usually don’t get to come along on those sorts of things. Having said that, maybe there would be some children on if there was some sort of christening celebration or school field trip on board at the time of the attack.
No, it’s canon there were families on board. It was simply too large to be anything but a city in space.
Yeah but they were evil so it doesn’t count /s
No /s necessary, you live in something called The Death Star, a weapon fresh from killing a planet, and you’re officially the eggs in the anti-evil omelette.
Not sure they even called it The Death Star, just Military Artificial Satellite Spaceship
Of course, the first working one was the 4th itteration of prototypes. So that makes it MASSIV (Military Artificial Satellite Spaceship IV)
I would have went with BABSS, big assed ball shaped spaceship/station.
You mean the Imperial Planetary Ore Extractor?
Thanks, now I’m hungry!
Cannon from where?
Best Buy. I’d go with a Brother instead if I was you, though. Won’t try to fuck you over anywhere near as much.
If I had the guess, one of the novels.
It’s an installation - a miltary base. Guarantee the workers had family spaces / on base housing in it. Considering the size of it, whole cities worth of people.
Bode from Jedi Survivor keeps his kid at an ISB base so it’s not outside the realm of reason.
Is it an installation or a ship? Couldn’t it move around the galaxy to attack different planets? If so, I think it’s more of a ship than a base. Only analog I can think of in our world would be aircraft carriers or battleships, which are commonly referred to as floating cities, yet they don’t have children or spouses living on board.
Only analog I can think of in our world would be aircraft carriers or battleships, which are commonly referred to as floating cities, yet they don’t have children or spouses living on board.
From what I’ve heard, one of the darker secrets though is tbat there is sex and sometimes childbirth that goes on.
Not something the Navy usually likes to talk about.
Yeah, I’m sure that’s happened way more than they’d like to admit.
deleted by creator
… Hundreds
(But not filled yet)
He destroyed the Death Star and rescued a princess. Those seem notable.
I had a friend that “trained” french kissing on her brother. She told me this when we were +25 like it was super nornal and one of the pluses of having a brother (he was 1 year young only, so he wasn’t being abused. They were just like this)
These are the dangers of exposing kids to Star Wars too early.
I mean, compare them at 23 next.
Anakin - supreme commander of all Empire forces, feared across the galaxy. Can do any crime with no repercussion, except treason.
Luke - Stranded on a swamp.Kills a Muppet with cringe questions
24?
This.
Me at 22:
You’re more than enough.
I love you guys 🥹
aww you’re so sweet thx
Be the sister fucker you want to see in the world. Don’t let your memes be dreams.
thank you, I will go look for a sister then
Kids - listen to me. There’s only ONE star wars movie. The rest are fan-made films that are fun but meaningless. Don’t get confused.
The Star Wars Holiday Special with the Ewoks?
That’s an odd way to spell Space Balls…
the clone wars movie?
Caravan Of Courage?
The Phantom Menace?
Anakin at 22 will be a father in the future.
lol
Ahem, he was also bulls-eyeing womp rats in his T-16.
“Future father” is the glass half-full version of “former child”.
I suppose “expecting father” is probably the more accurate phrase
