• kryptonianCodeMonkey@lemmy.world
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    1 month ago

    A great adventure is waiting for you ahead. Hurry onward Ladybug, or you will soon be dead. The journey before you may be long and filled with woe. But you must escape the gay man’s ass, or your tale can’t be told.

    Ladybug, Ladybug, Ladybug, Ladybug!

    Ladybug’s journey is distant, far and vast! To find his way out of a gay man’s ass! The road ahead is filled with danger and fright! But push onward Ladybug with all of your might!

    The Sparrow Prince lies somewhere way up ahead! Don’t look back Ladybug, or you will soon be dead! Ladybug, Ladybug, the time is growing late. Slow down now, and seal your fate.

    Take the magic helmet-torch to help you light the way, there’s still a lot of ground to cross inside the man so gay! Ahead of you lies adventure, and your strength still lies within! Freedom from the ass of doom is the treasure you will win!

    Ladybug came to the stomach dark… Near the depths of the lungs and heart…

    Catatafish of the stomach’s cove!

    Catatafish’s riddle will soon be told!

    Ladybug has made it out, his tale is nearly through!

    Now that you’re the beetle king has more adventures to go on! Fly away to faraway lands and to the setting sun! So many enemies and battles yet to fight! For Ladybug the Beetle King’s tale is told throughout the night!

    Lay-Lay-Ladybug Ladybug Lady-Ladybug Ladybug, Laid-lay-Ladybug, Beetle King.

  • jubilationtcornpone@sh.itjust.works
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    1 month ago

    That looks like more like an Asian Beetle than a typical Lady Bug. Those bastards will crawl into any crack or crevice they can squeeze themselves into to find a place to over-winter. They’re annoying, they smell like gross musty shit, and they will bite you given the opportunity.

    So while this is the first time I’ve seen one in someone’s colon, I’m not completely shocked either. In fact, it’s kind of “on brand”.

    • Shard@lemmy.world
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      1 month ago

      That is one hardy mofo.

      Before any sort of colonoscopy, they give you a days worth of liquid laxatives that you need to drink and you will spend the better part of the day before your procedure shitting what feels like a grown man worth of shit.

      Only then will the colon look as clean as it does in the picture.

      That damn bug survived all that. Either that or he climbed in a nice clean colon after all the shit was evacuated.

      • TheReturnOfPEB@reddthat.com
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        1 month ago

        the colon would be evacuated not the shit … shit cannot be evacuated.

        i mean if we are splitting hairs about how bugs end up in someone’s trumpet we might as well blow the melody in tune.

  • Gork@lemm.ee
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    1 month ago

    Now we just need to know how many of these crawl up our bums like the amount of spiders we allegedly eat per year.

  • BeigeAgenda
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    1 month ago

    Did they give Lindsay Graham a colonoscopy?

    • deegeese@sopuli.xyz
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      1 month ago

      Pretty sure it didn’t survive a trip through stomach acid.

      Did you ever find a bug on a vegetable in the market?

      🤔

      • Dragonstaff@leminal.space
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        1 month ago

        Maybe

        Granted, I think a human stomach is more difficult to traverse than a frog, and it’s more likely that it came in the back door. I’m just not willing to rule it out.

      • Eiri
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        1 month ago

        I vote food. There must be some unlikely placement along a meal that allows it to spend minimal time in contact with the acid.

    • Sludgehammer@lemmy.world
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      1 month ago

      My best guess is that it was on some of the equipment and somehow got transferred in during the colonoscopy.

  • Kowowow
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    1 month ago

    Please let this be a normal field trip

    • No_Eponym
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      1 month ago

      At my old school we never entered someone’s rectum without consent.

    • psud@aussie.zone
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      1 month ago

      🎵He anally inserted a spider to eat the fly; I don’t know why he inserted the fly; perhaps he’ll die🎵

  • Illogicalbit@lemmy.world
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    1 month ago

    If that ladybug makes it out, it’ll have one hell of a story to share with its fellow bugs.

    Sounds like a great writing prompt actually.

    • tehmics@lemmy.world
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      1 month ago

      Yeah it’d almost be like if a person got swallowed by a whale or something. Someone should write a book about it.