Couch Fucker wears a beard because he’s a piss baby. He thinks that it makes him look more manly than the pudge does.

I wear a beard for 2 reasons. 1. I am lazy. 2. I saw Jeremiah Johnson as a kid and that big bushy grizzly adams beard was the coolest shit ever.

We are not the same.

It’s a shitty beard… and real men don’t base their worth off beards anyhow.

what it means to be a man

We must be swift as the coursing river, with all the force of a great typhoon, with all the strength of a raging fire, mysterious as the dark side of the moon.

Kinda mean to call Usha Vance names…

Idk, I wear a short beard because I think I look better with one than without one. To wear your facial hair a certain way for any other reason is just wild to me.

I have a crappy beard, but at least it doesn’t make me look like a hamster like Vance’s does.

Lmao as a beard-haver myself: are the authors really encouraging us to take notes from that idiot heterosectional on literally anything? Because my reaction to basically anything that chucklefuck does is to point and laugh, regardless of the topic or context. It’s one of the most effective nonviolent tactics against fascists, after all.

TLDR:

While Vance has portrayed himself as a working man’s candidate, his selective criticism of corporate power is at best a secondary act in a more encompassing tirade against 21st-century modernity, whose primary sin has been to dismantle nuclear families supported by a child-rearing woman and make men miserable in the process. In that sense, Vance’s beard meets the moment of his party – one that, like some of its 16th century forebears, seeks to project toughness, aggression and grievance in an age where Republicans perceive masculinity as an endangered value. It doesn’t matter that Vance is friends with largely beardless Silicon Valley billionaires or provided legal representation to big pharmaceutical companies that fueled much of the opioid crisis that Republicans blame on immigrants – his performance has persuaded his supporters that he is the rugged everyman, and the beard is one of his most important props.

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