so my English teacher was kick ass and let us use tasteful swear words (no racial swears) and let us read them in class which was so cool and is probably the reason why i loved that English class. but anyway –edit yes i know the english is bad there are also a few swears viewer digression advised

NEW FROM MICROSOFT -WINDOWS 11

To Microsoft

I love how windows has automatic driver support

I have used windows XP since I was 6

Every program that ends with .exe runs great

But you got some problems to fix

it started with automatic random windows updates

BUT FOR FUCKS SAKE

LET ME UNINSTALL MICROSOFT EDGE

ITS NOT GOOD

ITS DOG SHIT YOUR SO DESPRATE

YOU MAKE IT RUN ON X86

IT EATS ALL MY RAM LIKE AN OBEESE MAN AT MCDONALDS

IT SLOWS MY COMPUTER DOWN

AND ITS GIVIN ME BLUE SCREENS WITH THAT STUPID ASS FROWN

HERES AN ERROR CODE Screw you

GOOD LUCK FINDING IT ON GOOGLE IT DOESN’T EXIST

YOUR RANDOMLY UNINSTALL IMPORTANT THINGS

HOW AM I SUPPOSED TO FIX MY PC WHEN IT UNINSTALLS THE DRIVER FOR MY DISPLAY

I WOULD RATHER USE MacOs Monterey

SCREW YOU, YOU UNIX WANNABE

YOUR WINDOWS 11 IS A STD.

YOU LEAVE A STUPID NOTEPAD OPEN WITH ONE COMMA

WHEN I CLICK SHUTDOWN YOU WONT CLOSE!

YOU ACT LIKE I INSTALLED WINDOWS

IT COMES PREINSTALLED, PRE DESTROYED, PRE BROKEN

AND YET YOU SAY YOUR OPIRATING SYSTEM IS THE BEST

75% OF GLOBAL MARKET SHARE IS A TRUE SHAME

YOUR OS IS REALLY LAME

YOU DON’T OWN YOUR COMPUTER

YOUR COMPUTER OWNS YOU

WINDOWS 3.1 1992

Your Os is as fun as a lobotomy

And is designed as well as a ford pinto

IT LOOKS LIKE A LOW BUDGE KDE DESKTOP

LINUX COULD MOP THE FLOOR WITH YOU

THE RISE OF LINUX DESKTOP 2022!

I LEAVE YOU IN YOUR SHAME

LYLING IN YOUR COFFIN BILL GATES TO BLAME

Linus Torvald was right

A computer is like air-conditioning

It becomes useless when you open windows

That is all

I leave you to dwell in your non open source

Propriety Hell

  • d3Xt3r@lemmy.nzM
    312·
    1 year ago

    To Microsoft, a Song

    In praise of Windows and its driver lore,
    Since six, with XP, I’ve been at its door.
    Each program ending with “.exe” does soar,
    But issues, oh Microsoft, hard to ignore.

    The automatic updates, without refrain,
    Yet, a plea, loud and clear, let me explain,
    Uninstalling Edge should be without pain,
    Its consumption, like a feast, hard to contain.

    Blue screens appear, with that mocking frown,
    Error codes hidden, have me run around.
    Important tools vanish, with no renown,
    How to fix, when the drivers just can’t be found?

    MacOS Monterey, a tempting fate,
    Your Windows 11, issues to slate.
    Notepads lingering, making me wait,
    Preinstalled, yet feels it’s second-rate.

    Your market share, a towering fame,
    Yet sometimes, the OS feels rather tame.
    To own our device is the end game,
    But it feels like Windows plays its own claim.

    Once in '92, Windows was a thrill,
    Now, its charm seems like an uphill.
    Linux rises, ready for the kill,
    In 2022, it’s taking its fill.

    In your shadow, Mr. Gates, we see,
    Linus Torvalds spoke true, let’s agree,
    A PC’s like air-con, clear as can be,
    Useless it becomes, when a window is free.

    So here I stand, my piece is said,
    Hoping for better days ahead.
    Non-open source, a path you tread,
    In proprietary depths, where angels fear to tread.