My problem is most men around me are right leaning and think trump is a savior, or have no political affliation, but are into Canadian cultures i didn’t really stick to while growing up (hockey is what i really mean, i dont like it). For me loneliness for me is finding a companion i can share my life with who i know has similar interests as me, and who i know i can trust. I never had a group of friends and i was bullied alot so i don’t really connect well with groups of people, and push my way out of that. My communication with the outside world is only on here, and has been since 2008.
The article fails to mention the lack of third places in North America. Mediterranean cultures are extremely traditionally masculine, but have a culture of men gathering in, eg, coffee houses to chit chat, play cards, backgammon etc. So traditional masculinity alone cannot be an explanation.
Suburban life, car dependency and hustle culture is what’s killing us.
“Men’s groups” are not going to work because they require intentionality. A third place is just always there, you just go whenever.
It’s also warm in mediterranean countries, you don’t need a third place there - it’s the street. In Germany there is same problem with third places, there is a rather unique club culture there but for obvious reasons male only clubs are not really a thing.
It is hard to have male friends, but not impossible.
I’ve had luck bonding with men over shared interests. Stuff like firefighting, CrossFit, rock climbing, weight lifting, running, programming, board games, DnD, painting, figure drawing, theater, sailing, and music are all great ways to meet men and have something to bond over initially.
The trick is being interested in something and finding other people (like through meet ups) who are into the same things. Not all are best friends forever, but a few are lifelong.
Or having female friends. For me it’s much easier to connect with women than men for some reason.
