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Remember, dear
underlings[the preferred terminology is teamlings now] associates, we’re all in this together! Your success is our success! Now let’s all work harder, together, to succeed!I’m off to my ‘battle of wits’ with my pal Gandalf, won’t be able to answer your messages until next week.
Now let me take 16 million in bonuses while I slash your benefits
Lorewise, Saruman was supposed to be something of an engineering prodigy
He was a Maiar of Aulë, which was the Vala of Crafting, so prodigy is probably underselling it. As a side note, considering what happened with both Saruman and Sauron, I would say Aulë was probably a very shitty boss.
He probably was - which is why they prefer to promote shitty engineers to management, usually.
Aule also created the dwarves against the explicit orders of Iluvatar, so it kinda runs in the family.
Wasn’t Morgoth a Maiar of Aule too?Nope, a Valar. Thanks for the correction!Morgoth was a Vala, probably even the most powerful among them.
He turned a park and a forest into a huge industrial complex, making an fully equipped army in a few years.
From an engineering point of view this is impressive.
He’d been amassing that army since 2953, and only revealed his true self by going sicko mode on Gandalf in 3018.
Thanks for the details, I’ve look for it but could not find how long it took him.
The Orthanc wiki page. I basically lucked out, search engines suck these days
You know, I’m something of a wizard myself
orcs should unionize
so, we are agreed, should an orc be injured on the job the employer is obligated to have his blood distributed amongst the fellow orcs in order if most seniority, while his work will be distributed by least seniority, unless none are qualified to do it, in which case the union shall create a new posting for all the register to…
You should read the Last Ringbearer if you haven’t.
Yeah but they habe an MBA so 🤷♂️
Keep pulling on those ropes.
Tbh Saruman’s never going to get all those Uruk-hai hatching pods through planning at the local council if he goes on like this
If you find this entertaining, you’d enjoy Tom Holt books. This is basically his whole style.
You can’t do that without linking!
That paragraph above reminds me most of The Out-sorcerer’s Apprentice. Where to quote from the wikipedia page
‘a fairy tale universe is exploited economically’.He’s written like 40 books
and they’re all pretty good fun (the fantasy stuff at least, his historical fiction wasn’t my jam), not high literature or anything though, just nerdy, silly humour with some fun clever bits.That piqued my interest, gonna check it out. Thanks!
The first 2 books, ‘Doughnut’, and ‘When It’s A Jar’, I would normally recommend over ‘The Out-sorcerer’s Apprentice’, they’re more scifi slanted and imo tightly written.
The fundamental technology tying the books together is re-explained in book 3 though and you can figure stuff out without having read books 1 & 2, but it’s probably not going to be quite as funny without all that pained context and layers of multidimensional headfuckery.
They need to hire Earl Sinclair and the rest of the WeSaySo gang!
They got the results the Dark Lord would have wanted
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