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Joined 3 years ago
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Cake day: June 4th, 2023

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  • I think you and shalafi might be using different definitions of “gets to choose”. Using a depressed person as an analogy since I think this is better understood: You don’t get to choose to be happy, but you can choose to take steps towards getting help so that you can better manage it. It sounds like they’re talking about the former while you’re talking about the latter.

    Similarly with stigmatization. It’s one thing to stigmatize acting on your suicidal ideation. It’s another to stigmatize having suicidal ideation in the first place.


  • No one’s disagreeing that it’s wrong and needs to be addressed. The disagreement is on whether pedophiles get to choose who they’re attracted to. This is an important distinction because firstly, the origin of their thoughts/actions determines the course of action necessary to keep it in check. Second, shaming someone for something they can’t control is one of the most effective ways of discouraging treatment. Third, that wasn’t a preface. It was the answer to the question they responded to.

    Regarding suicidality: I believe that the approach of stigmatizing and criminalizing was often taken in the past and found to be ineffective. I’ve been seeing a big movement towards more open dialogue and encouraging treatment in the past decades.









  • Can you use that gift card anywhere? If yes, then first convert it to cash. Your parents may be covering all your expenses, but they still need to buy groceries. The next time they do, ask them to use your gift card and give you the equivalent amount in cash. Now you have more flexibility to do whatever you want with that cash. Buy something nice, save/invest, etc. You have plenty of advice from others on this already.


  • You’re looking at these strength standards as if “beginner” means “bad”. It doesn’t. It’s just an arbitrary label someone decided to slap on arbitrary numbers. What you should be focusing on is whether or not you’re progressing. That’s where you can make judgements on whether you’re doing well or not.

    As for your issue with DB bench, my solution would be to drop the weight and do something differently to make it harder when using lighter weights. That can mean any combination of the following: increasing the number of reps, increasing the range of motion, or increasing the duration of the pause at the bottom. For comparison, my work sets for DB bench are typically 30-40% of the numbers I use on barbell bench. You’re currently doing 85%.









  • howrartoMicroblog Memes@lemmy.worldGood branding
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    14 days ago

    Ah, I was hoping for something a little less time consuming, but that may have been too optimistic. I’ve listened to NPR and their music is good, but it’s pretty much always the sort of pop and pop-adjacent stuff that you can easily find without much effort. Same deal with recommendations from friends.

    The most promising non-Spotify recommendation system I’ve found so far is listenbrainz. It’s still not giving any good recommendations though.