• Ænima@lemm.ee
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    1 year ago

    I hate myself, this world, and most people so much that I want to do psychedelics just to kill that side of me and, hopefully, start feeling like I have some sort of power again. I am about to look into buying the spores and growing my own, but I don’t want a shit ton of extra shrooms. I just want to do one heavy dose, let my inner id die, and live my life again.

    • remotelove
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      1 year ago

      I totally get that. Really.

      I can’t tell you how to trip or what your dosages are going to be. Every person is different and your mind may not be cut out for what you will experience. Taking one mega dose without experience or without a friend around is not recommended unless you already have a firm grip on reality and are an extremely self aware person.

      If you need advice, DM me and I can tell you how to get started growing or ask around in /c/shrooms (Edit: added a link to the instance and community in a separate comment)and you will get some good advice. There are easy ways to grow these days without needing equipment for sterilization. This instance is shrooms friendly, so I hang out here. A shoebox size grow will get you a few trips, so don’t worry about having too many.

      One dose may work for you or it may not. If you know someone that you can trust fully and they have a super chill vibe, it’s good practice to trip with a partner. Your own mind can be a scary place if left to its own devices and a partner is a good source of reality checks if you get “lost”.

      Ego death (or ego dissolution) is a very real thing that you can experience. Your existence seems to stop being about just you and you can develop an almost spiritual connection with everything around you. It’s life changing, but a person should be aware of what is real and what is actually part of the trip. In some cases, reality does mix with what you perceive as “real” and it can be exceedingly complex to filter out what is going on.

      Above all else, you need to be in a healthy environment. Environmental context can absolutely determine how your trip is going to be. Psychedelics can amplify what are normally passive feelings and you want to set the tone as best as you can.

      I have tried many different dosage levels in many different environments. I have had good experiences and also negative ones. In my case, shrooms helped me perceive the world from a brand new point of view and everything felt new again. I can almost feel how my brain is being rewired and it is very interesting.

      • Ænima@lemm.ee
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        1 year ago

        I love you and your explanation. My wife has done them a couple of times. I’ve been listening to, “How to change your mind” audiobook, and it makes me really want to experience it. I’m an empath so I fully expect to experience the ego death and I welcome the experience no matter how it goes. I have saved your message and will definitely look into that lemmy group and see about setting up my own temp grow environment.

        I appreciate you!

    • intensely_human@lemm.ee
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      1 year ago

      Do it man! I hope you find a way to engage where you feel like you’re pedaling life not just screaming downhill with no brakes.

    • Mango@lemmy.world
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      1 year ago

      Uhh yeah don’t do that. It’s not like that at all. Maybe try coke, but that’s not gonna last long.

      • remotelove
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        1 year ago

        Amphetamines like that will do more harm than good and it’s not really a stable high as far as drugs go. Plus, testing coke is a pain as you don’t really know what it is cut with.

        Yeah, of course. Amphetamines can be used medicinally, but it’s better they be amphetamine salts and are used on a regular schedule. I have been taking Adderall for years, and after so long, it’s a chore to constantly use them. Also, the long term side effects absolutely suck ass. They work, but I would rather not take them any more.

        • Mango@lemmy.world
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          1 year ago

          Yeah I’m not really recommending it. I’m just trying to say that guy has the wrong idea and is gonna be pretty shocked when he realizes what ride he’s getting on.