• jaschen306@sh.itjust.worksEnglish
        1·
        3 months ago

        I started my bidet life with those cheap ones that only spray regular water. It’s honestly all you really need.

          • jaschen306@sh.itjust.worksEnglish
            3·
            3 months ago

            TOTO is the most gentle and most reliable. I bought mine in Japan 15 years ago and it’s still working like it was new.

            The 2 extra features outside of the norm is the heated seat and what I call the constipation spray. It’s a narrow spray that sprays warm water up your butt and helps get the poop out. Haha.

    • whelk@retrolemmy.comEnglish
      5·
      3 months ago

      I’ll never go back, but all interested souls should be made aware of the bidet-user’s curse: Using bathrooms that don’t have them becomes a harrowing experience

      • jaschen306@sh.itjust.worksEnglish
        1·
        3 months ago

        I also find that a warm bidet helps me get more poop out. So after thinking I’m done, I spray and about to finish and then more poop comes out. It’s a game changer.

      • jaschen306@sh.itjust.worksEnglish
        2·
        3 months ago

        Bro, buy a portable travel bidet. The downside of those portable bidet is the water volume that you’re used to is significantly less. So sometimes I’ll bring a empty water bottle to refill after I deplete the water reservoir.

  • birdwing@lemmy.blahaj.zoneEnglish
    18·
    3 months ago

    thank the rules i’ve never had to do this.

    if you ever get in such an emergency, best to use just another tissue, or a towel, and if all that isn’t there, sock i guess?

  • FenrirIII@lemmy.worldEnglish
    181·
    3 months ago

    As a man, I have my TP usage measured out. 2 sheets (folded) per wipe. Repeat as necessary.

    Wife moves in. TP roll eaten by unknown creatures on a daily basis.

    • lepinkainen@lemmy.worldEnglish
      11·
      3 months ago

      There are people in the world who wrap their whole hand in multiple layers of paper for every wipe

    • AWistfulNihilist@lemmy.worldEnglish
      43·
      3 months ago

      Just get a bidet like a civilized person. Tp is gross and wipes (the only actual way to clean the shit off your ass instead of just painting a thin tissue brown) are horrible.

      I also wouldn’t be proud of how little tp your dry shits take, you just kinda sound dehydrated.

      • FenrirIII@lemmy.worldEnglish
        63·
        3 months ago

        I’m surprised that you can read this post given how far up your own ass your head is. Did you have a crystal chandelier installed?

  • F/15/Cali@threads.net@sh.itjust.worksEnglish
    16·
    3 months ago

    And then it bobs on top of the surface of the water like the saddest, most persistent log you’ve ever seen, until you drown it with piss some hours later. Terrible for your pipes. Do not recommend

  • TankovayaDiviziya@lemmy.worldEnglish
    15·
    3 months ago

    As a South East Asian, we clean our ass with water and soap. The first time I pooped outside of home was when I was a toddler during school. The restroom next to my classroom had a tap water and a bucket with “dipper” (according to translation, that’s what it’s called). We would wash our nethers by scooping the water with “dipper” from the bucket and then clean our hole with soap. It was awkward doing it outside of home, and I have mentally trained my mind to avoid pooping outside of home. Weirdly enough, it worked because I only feel that “terrible need” when at home. A dad’s friend also has the same mindset as me. While driving us home, my friend told his dad there are public toilets he could use if he really needs it badly. The dad said he doesn’t want to poop outside the house.

    The second and last time I pooped outside of home was years ago as an adult at work. Emigrating to Europe, I had to use toilet tissue, but I felt dirty not cleaning my asshole with water and soap. Good thing it was near the end of my shift at that time and went home shortly.

    • deus@lemmy.worldEnglish
      7·
      3 months ago

      For what’s worth, I was born and raised in a country where toilet paper is usually all you have to work with and even I don’t think that’s very hygienic.

      • TankovayaDiviziya@lemmy.worldEnglish
        9·
        3 months ago

        There are bidets and Japanese automated bidet toilets available to be installed. But as South Park noted, many parts of the world still use toilet paper because of propaganda from big toilet paper!

  • 🍉 Albert 🍉@lemmy.worldEnglish
    12·
    3 months ago

    first time i failed my driving test I went to the mall, to a massive shite, and there’s was no tp, you can guess where the “Failed” paper ended up in.