I think you mean:
“the quality and expediency of healthcare … in America.”
This is where we know it’s not a historically american proverb.
It has very good quality and expendiency.
All you have to do is buy a wing.
“snitches get to glue their own wounds shut and hope it doesn’t get infected” just doesn’t have the same ring to it.
Hey, uh, don’t glue deep wounds. If it’s going past the subcutaneous fat–and you should be able to see the fat layer if it’s a deep cut, assuming you can slow the bleeding enough–use staples. You can get a cheap, disposable, sterile, pre-loaded surgical stapler off Amazon, or lots of other, more reputable sites. Glue seals everything in, and when you finally get medical attention, it’s going to be a bitch to remove if the wound needs to be irrigated or debrided. Staples pop off quickly and with minimal discomfort.
If it’s actually spurting/spraying blood, get a tourniquet on as high and tight as possible, pack the wound with gauze (or a t-shirt), put direct pressure on it, and get to an ER immediately, regardless of the cost.
I sense an influencer’s “we put Amazon one day delivery to the ultimate test!” vid dropping soon.
regardless of the cost
Whoa slow down there!
An ER costs you money.
An arterial wound costs you your life.
It’s your choice, but medical debt doesn’t even go on your credit report.
I would not buy surgical staples off amazon. Half of everything there is a knockoff and who knows if you’ll get the real stuff or some kind of imitation.
If you don’t like Amazon, you can buy a stapler at nearly any veterinary supply store without being a DVM. Surgical supplies intended for human use are harder to get, even though the exact same tools are used in veterinary medicine. Like Dermabond, for instance; you can’t get it for people readily, but it’s a snap to get it for animals, even though it’s exactly the same thing.
For accuracy, it should be updated to read “Snitches will need stitches.”
… :(
Need might be too strong. We would survive not stitching up many wounds that we currently do. It should probably be “snitches would probably like to have stitches”.
“Snitches will find themselves in a situation in which stitches would be desirable”
There you go, that’s the one.
Perfect to get your point across swiftly
Sidestep the whole issue by saying: “Snitches end-up in ditches.”
Testifiers pay health care providers.
“Sir, did you just assume I have healthcare?”
Anyone can stitch you up.
The quality varies wildly.Snitches get gangrene doesn’t roll off the tongue as good.
It does sound way meaner lol.
Oh wow I thought getting stitches could literally mean “getting stabbed”.
Snitches get ditches.
The people getting snitched on get better healthcare
Uh, the expression is more of a “if you snitch, we’ll sew your mouth shut” kind of thing, rather than it having anything to do with medical care.
No, it was indeed with the idea that someone would cut you with a knife which would require stitches.
It’s like 30 years old from when hospitals were…expensive still yes, but not that bad.
The idea of hospitals being expensive is so alien to me, that’s genuinely awful.
actually dystopian
Really? Wonder where I remember my version from…
