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The Picard Maneuver@startrek.website to Comic Strips@lemmy.world · 1 year ago

Christmas in Gotham [Safely Endangered]

startrek.website

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Christmas in Gotham [Safely Endangered]

startrek.website

The Picard Maneuver@startrek.website to Comic Strips@lemmy.world · 1 year ago
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Website https://safelyendangered.com/

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  • Blahaj_Blast@lemmy.blahaj.zone
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    1 year ago

    Never start with the head, the victim gets all fuzzy. He can’t feel the next- [CRACK]

    • MoonMoon@lemmy.world
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      1 year ago

      See?

  • SokathHisEyesOpen@lemmy.ml
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    1 year ago

    Isn’t Santa omniscient? He should already know where the presents are, so he must be a sadist.

    • bionicjoey
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      1 year ago

      Santa isn’t omniscient. He sees you when you’re sleeping. He knows when you’re awake. We can infer from this phrasing that he can’t see you when you’re awake. He also knows if you’ve been bad or good but that information isn’t as specific.

      • swab148@startrek.website
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        1 year ago

        What if I upload my consciousness to the internet, then ran that through a VPN and Tor and iP2P and all that, think I could shake him?

        • bionicjoey
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          1 year ago

          You need to be behind 7 proxies to evade him

          • swab148@startrek.website
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            1 year ago

            Fake: basically VPNs with more steps

            Gay: behind

            • bionicjoey
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              1 year ago

              Oh shit, you figured me out

              • swab148@startrek.website
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                1 year ago

                I’m good with secrets.

          • brbposting@sh.itjust.works
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            1 year ago

            TIL ED is back

        • SokathHisEyesOpen@lemmy.ml
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          1 year ago

          You can’t even shake Facebook or Google that way. How do you expect it to work against a demi-god?

          • swab148@startrek.website
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            1 year ago

            I think we’re discussing the limitations of a fictional being. In the context of “Santa Claus is Coming to Town”, I’m not sure his powers apply to the internet, being that “He sees you when you’re sleeping…”, but he only “… knows when you’re awake.” So if my incorporeal consciousness was uploaded to the internet, do you think I could spoof my online status to green, so that I’d be untraceable to Santa?

            • SokathHisEyesOpen@lemmy.ml
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              1 year ago

              Possibly. I have seen many drawings depicting Santa being threatened by technology.

              • swab148@startrek.website
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                1 year ago

                If we’re building a thing, I don’t think Krampus would be as limited, but his punishment wouldn’t be as dire.

        • EdibleFriend@lemmy.world
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          1 year ago

          Only if, the moment you get uploaded, you say ‘I’m in.’

          • swab148@startrek.website
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            1 year ago

            My online consciousness will 100% be wearing 1337 h4x0r sunglasses

        • agent_flounder@lemmy.world
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          1 year ago

          Idk I bet he’s got contacts all throughout the NSA. He’s got a hell of a blackmailing racket going.

          • swab148@startrek.website
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            1 year ago

            Or maybe part of his elf crew includes an elite hacking division, and he’s essentially in every government network.

      • psud@lemmy.world
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        I reckon he knows if you’ve been bad or good because of the parents’ assessment of their children’s goodness. That is not a specific Santa power, except in as much as the power of Santa to get that parental assessment is a power

        I think it has to be based on the parents, as clearly bad kids still get presents, and only their mother thinks they’re good.

      • aeronmelon@lemmy.world
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        1 year ago

        Our subconsciousness dreams Santa into existence.

    • c24w@lemmy.world
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      1 year ago

      He lacks omnipresents!

    • Skull giver@popplesburger.hilciferous.nl
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      1 year ago

      deleted by creator

    • The Menemen!@lemmy.world
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      1 year ago

      Santa only watches children though I think.

  • BlanketsWithSmallpox@lemmy.world
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    Be the Grinch. Get ostracized by looking different. Slowly get shunned from your community and froze out. Be ignored. Everyone hates you for no reason.

    They rub it in your face by being as loud and noisy as possible. You tried to get away but they still flaunt it in your face. Only your best doggo understands and loves you still.

    You go down and try to stop it and take their shit. Next day, they’re still singing their fucking songs. You give them their shit back and NOW they like you.

    Lesson: Nobody will like you until it looks like you did something good. Even if it was just a problem you made and you fixed but nothing actually changes.

    • Electromechanical_Supergiant@lemmynsfw.com
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      1 year ago

      Just another Christmas story with terrible morals. They’re surprisingly common.

      • BlanketsWithSmallpox@lemmy.world
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        1 year ago

        Rudolph: It’s not okay to be weird unless you’re useful lol.

    • Ilovethebomb@lemm.ee
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      1 year ago

      Even if it was just a problem you made and you fixed but nothing actually changes.

      Isn’t this half of what some IT people do?

    • meyotch@slrpnk.net
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      1 year ago

      The True Meaning of Christmas™️

  • IninewCrow
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    1 year ago

    Blocks the door with a chair

  • BreadstickNinja@lemmy.world
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    1 year ago

    Coco

    • tuck182@lemmy.world
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      1 year ago

      Maybe that’s one of the elves?

  • aeronmelon@lemmy.world
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    1 year ago

    Gordon: “Which one are you going after?”

    Santa: “MRS. CLAUS!”

    Gordon, to his officers: “We’re going after Rudolph!”

  • Daft_ish@lemmy.worldBanned
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    1 year ago

    Removed by mod

  • Dr. Coomer@lemmy.world
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    1 year ago

    “You’ll never get it out of me, you jolly basterd.”

  • vinter@mander.xyz
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    1 year ago

    Why are there so many “webcomics” that look exactly like this? AI generated?

    • The Picard Maneuver@startrek.websiteOP
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      1 year ago

      Safely Endangered is a pretty popular webcomic, so I highly doubt it’s AI, but I guess a lot of the styles we see are becoming sort of similar.

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