• irmoz@reddthat.com
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    9 months ago

    If someone thinks that they are respecting themselves by willfully making decisions that they know are terrible for their health

    I’m gonna need you to point out someone saying this before I take this claim seriously.

    I know I have plenty of personal flaws, but I’m willing to take criticism of them.

    Unprompted criticism of your body is just bullying. Accepting that requires a lack of self respect.

    I’m not going to expect respect for doing fuck all about my personal problems and I don’t think anyone else should.

    You’re dragging the goalposts around and humping them, at this point. I didn’t say “respect for doing nothing.” Just… respect. The basic respect a human deserves for being human. Not getting on your knees, calling them lord, and complimenting their choices of fatty food. Just the bare minimum of not bullying them. Is that so hard?

    I respect people that put in hard work and effort towards achieving their goals

    Okay? But not every action is one to be judged on that criteria. Not everything is done to meet a goal. Just walking through town isn’t one of those things.

    I don’t respect pity parties.

    Who’s asking you to? Where’s the pity? Where’s the party?

    • XIIIesq@lemmy.world
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      9 months ago

      I think people deserve dignity, but that respect is something that’s earnt.

      If fat people don’t like being criticised for their bad choices and unhealthy, unattractive bodies, that’s really not my problem. If you hate that someone thinks you’re fat, lose some weight, is it really worth digging your heels in over to make a point about a lack of respect?

      • irmoz@reddthat.com
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        9 months ago

        Is it so hard to just not bully people? You don’t have to agree, you just have to not say anything. You’re the one dying on a hill, here.

        • XIIIesq@lemmy.world
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          9 months ago

          We have blurred lines between the ideas of a lack of respect and bullying.

          It’s disrespectful to say “my god, that’s a big fat arse!”, but it’s not bullying unless it’s repetitive and used with the intent of hurting their feelings, bullying also implies an imbalance of power.

          • irmoz@reddthat.com
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            9 months ago

            It doesn’t have to be repetitive, or an imbalance of power. Simply trying to hurt someone’s feelings for no reason would still be bullying. And i can’t think of any other reason to comment negatively on a stranger’s appearance to their face.

            “My my, you have such wonky teeth!”

            That would upset me, no matter who said it or how often.

            • XIIIesq@lemmy.world
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              9 months ago

              The difference is that you have almost no control over whether your teeth are straight or not, or whether you’re wealthy enough to afford braces.

              Anyone can put down the fork, drink water instead of mountain dew and choose not to have desert.

              • irmoz@reddthat.com
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                9 months ago

                Don’t move the goalposts. You may be able to refuse dessert, but you absolutely cannot simply choose to not be fat. It takes more effort than that.

                • XIIIesq@lemmy.world
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                  9 months ago

                  Yes you can. I obviously don’t mean that you can decide not to be fat and the weight will magically disappear.

                  Every time you put food in your mouth, you’re making a conscious choice, you’re not “deciding to be fat” per se, but you are fully aware that too many rain drops causes a flood and that it will take a similar time of less rain drops for the flood to dry up.

                  If you commit to eating less calories, you will lose weight, that’s not an opinion, it’s a fact.

                  • irmoz@reddthat.com
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                    9 months ago

                    Oh, so you can’t just decide to not be fat? My point is proven, then.

                    What about people with medical conditions, slow metabolisms, thyroid conditions?

                    Yes, it is as simple as calories in, calories out - but who can tell precisely what their calorie allotment is? And is the decision of what to eat completely in everyone’s hands? Food deserts exists as an external factor, and mental illness and addiction exists as an internal factor.