This will probably be my last question here (at least for a while). My last two questions were about flirting and expressing romantic interest to someone. In short in was a mixture of: ‘Flirting is important.’ and ‘Just be yourself.’
I want to give flirting a proper, respectable shot. I want to see if this is something I can develop and get creative with.
At the same time I’m also hearing I should just be myself and let it be natural. Well, I never flirt, ever. So if I do, it will not be natural nor count as being myself.
So, what should I do? What does it mean to be yourself, while trying to change?
“Being yourself” does not preclude personal development. Personal growth and learning skills, even something like flirting, is part of becoming a more well-rounded version of yourself.
Thing is, flirting isn’t something you need to master or even be great at. As a matter of fact, being “terrible” at flirting can be just as effective.
The goal of flirting is to engage in social interaction that expresses interest and attraction.
I think you’re putting too much pressure on yourself. You probably shouldn’t even call it flirting. Put that notion aside. Focus on intentionally communicating your interest.
If you’re interested in a person, then find ways to express that. It can be light-hearted and flirtatious, but being terrible at flirting works too. So do it terribly. You’ll eventually figure out what doesn’t help communicate your intent. Flirting is a gentle and indirect way of expressing that intent. Many people are more direct and it can work for them too. Being more direct may be better for you. 🤷🏽♂️
Regardless of what you do, be respectful. Be playful if you want. But most importantly, communicate your intent and desire.