DISCLAIMER - I am not planning on fighting a pelican.
there’s a brown pelican that hangs out on the railing of a very narrow portion of a boardwalk nearby. the only reason it makes me nervous is because it’s huge, but their nails look short, and their beaks are pointed, but curved downwards so they would have to try to bite me with that long thing instead of pecking me.
like, if a bird capable of clawing or eating my eyes out attacked my face, I’d honestly have no qualms about killing it immediately. but if I ever get attacked by a pelican, it looks like I could just kind of hold it off without having to hurt it. am I right in that?
I need this on a T-shirt.
Seriously, this is the best thing I have seen on the Internet in a long time. It’s like I’m in 2013 all over again. Lol.
I thought the exact same thing when I read the title and first line. Post of the year.
it should be like “I’m not planning on fighting a pelican”
Nah, I like the original way more.
“I’m not planning on fighting a pelican” comes off as “well, I’m not planning on it, but it could happen”,
while “I’m not planning on fighting a pelican” comes off as almost a political statement: “Statement: I do not have plans to fight a pelican.” like a politician at a press release.
I feel the latter would confuse people more. Lol.
during the first women’s march I wore a shirt that said “nobody for president” and everybody loved it including the counterprotesters