• IninewCrow
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    3 months ago

    Same here, I don’t have kids … but my best example of parenting were my own parents. Mom made homemade food just about every day when I was a kid. She made food and we had to eat … had to eat it. There was no option, no opinion or alternative. Mom ran the dinner table like a dictatorship … there was no say or opinion in the matter … you were served a plate of food and you ate it.

    I don’t say that I fully agree with it because I remember bawling my eyes out a few times because I didn’t like the meal. However, it did force me to appreciate a lot of different foods because I just didn’t know any better back then. Plus I was always taking in plenty of nutrition. One example I always think of now is … fresh pan fried fish. We are indigenous and mom always pan fried four or five large fresh trout or arctic char (big fish that were about two feet long!) for the family every Friday (because we were also good Christians). She made nothing but pan fried fish, several stacks of them and it was basically all you could eat.

    Problem was … as a dumb kid … I didn’t like fish, so I stayed away from it for several years and just nibbled on it once in a while. Mom would make me eat a whole piece and I would force myself.

    Later on, when I was about 18, 19, 20 I started liking the fish but then mom stopped making it all. Now I crave that damned fish and I want to tell my damned kid self to eat that fish and eat as much of it as he can. Man I miss all that fish now. I wish had it again.

    Now I go to fish places or order fish specials and none of them taste any good and all I can imagine is mom’s platters and platters of fresh fried fish that my uncles caught that afternoon. I’m sorry mom :(

    • shadow@lemmy.sdf.org
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      3 months ago

      I mean … Of your mom’s still around… Maybe buy fish and like, ask to learn the recipe and cook it yourself? I’m not a mom, I’m a dad, but I cook a lot and if my kid wanted to learn what I do when cooking, that’d be cool.

      • IninewCrow
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        3 months ago

        Sadly mom passed away about ten years ago. And I’m not ashamed to say I’m a pretty good cook, mom actually taught me a lot as I worked alongside her in a fastfood joint we ran for a few years. And yes I’ve cooked wild fish myself before, it’s a huge job and it’s also a rare event. I no longer live near my original home so I can’t find, buy or even get the same wild fish. And mom made them in the most heavy batter cooked in pure lard. It’s not exactly healthy to make. The thing I miss is the circumstance of it all … I was young, I was kid, I could eat whatever I wanted no matter how unhealthy it was and mom made it a particular way with a particular pan in a very haphazard kitchen with an old propane stove. No matter how much I may try, I’ll never be able to replicate one piece of fish, let alone an entire platter of the stuff. I know most of mom’s recipes now, the easy ones at least … but I’ll never get those same fish I remembered as a kid.

        • bean@lemmy.world
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          3 months ago

          Many of my own childhood mistakes, cause same cringe feelings. It’s how we grow and learn. We eventually reflect and grow too.

          Clearly you loved your mom, and she loved you. It’s not about the fish. She might have said today: don’t be silly give me a hug 🥰 and have you cook for her!

          • IninewCrow
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            3 months ago

            Melted my heart and made me tear up to hear that … if mom were here I would have made her whatever she wanted.

            Stay well my friend and I hope you and your family are happy, healthy, wealthy and wise … and the spirits of those that have gone before are close to your heart.