Probably with blood from that fan hitting me in the face.

Get a camping shower, a paddling pool, two portable gas burners, a microwave, two second-hand coffins, paint everything white, and take some photos with a fish eye lens on a potato.

The next morning slap that shit on RightMove as a two bedroom micro-apartment for £1000 per month.

You’ll have 12 offers in by lunchtime.