I recall, years ago, both having a head cold and also persistent pain in my knees. I’d booked a doctor’s appointment for the knees; I knew the cold just needed rest and with work being as busy as it was I figured I’d use the time I already had taken off for the bug to get in for my knees.
My partner watched me drag my sad, snotty body out of my track pants and hoody into smart casual clothes, put on makeup, fix my hair. He was like, ‘why are you doing that - you’re sick, you’re going to a doctor, you can look sick.’
I was like, ‘yeah, but I need to make sure I’m taken seriously and have the best chance of considered care. You don’t get that guarantee as a woman. Got to ‘look like’ a real patient.’
I think I read a study years ago about it, but I can’t find it now. But my own anecdotal experience is that if I dress how I feel, I get worse treatment. The impression I get is they think my thoughts/concerns are hypochondria/Dr. Google nonsense.
If I dress how I would for work - casual professional, I’m seen as an insightful patient with some valid speculation about my problem. Male doctors are the worst but I’ve experienced it with women too.
It’s fucked. It’s an obvious privilege too. If you don’t work a white collar job and don’t have those outfits in your wardrobe, or an interest in wearing makeup or whatever - does that mean you’re just always going to get slightly worst treatment than me?
I’m not even getting into the POC aspect, can’t even imagine that on top.
Fucking hell, I’ve literally had to do the same thing when I was experiencing chest pain and heart palpitations! My husband thought I was nuts for putting on makeup and donning “business wear” before he took me to our local urgent care, but I did so I wouldn’t be dismissed due to having anxiety on my records. I knew myself what I was feeling wasn’t anxiety, but if I looked in anyway or shape or form as an “anxious woman” I wouldn’t be taken seriously. I even had to specify we needed to go to the one location that was further away due to their closer location dismissing me for a different issue that was properly looked into at this preferred location.
I was lucky to be listened to in that situation, got an EKG, and a referral out to a cardiologist; but that only happened because I had a younger doctor who wanted to rule out all possibilities. A few months previously I was dealing with numbness in one of my legs and the other urgent care I wanted to avoid literally sent me out the door after looking at me for 10 minutes and doing a leg stretch. The issue persisted and it wasn’t until I went to this same second location that someone actually ran some blood work on me and referred me for an ultrasound on my leg. It just shouldn’t be that hard to be properly treated when both of these experiences revealed issues that needed to be treated.
They let me walk around for 5 months with a broken vertebra pinching my nerves because they figured it was just tendonitis. They were completely baffled that PT was making things worse. I was finally able to get a referral because my dad came with me to an appointment (I was 28). The new doc ordered an MRI first thing and found the vertebra.
Thankful you could afford MRI! I know someone who was ordered four, and could not afford them, also could not afford a gastroenterologist appointment. Of course, this is charted as noncompliance, so…
It was a work injury so thankfully I didn’t get the bill.
Of course that would be seen as noncompliance, they were choosing to be poor/have crappy insurance. We women need to just stop being so hysterical and pull ourselves up by our boot straps. (So much /s).
Oh wow! I’m so glad it wasn’t at your expense. Did work retaliate for you having to be treated at their insurance expense? It’s not uncommon where I live for people to be dissuaded by fear of unemployment. I wish I were being hyperbolic.
It’s infuriating. We’re treated as if we are naughty children, seeking excuses to play hooky from first grade,.
Yes, they did fire me after they found out it was a broken vertebra. I ended up getting an attorney and while I didn’t get my job back they did have to pay me some lost wages. It was probably for the best though, as I couldn’t have continued to do the job anyway.
Lol, naughty kids trying to play hooky is a perfect way to describe it.
Yep. When I was going through extreme tendonitis and also sciatic nerve pain, I made sure I ‘looked wealthy’ so I wouldn’t be accused of drug seeking when asking for pain meds. So dumb.
I recall, years ago, both having a head cold and also persistent pain in my knees. I’d booked a doctor’s appointment for the knees; I knew the cold just needed rest and with work being as busy as it was I figured I’d use the time I already had taken off for the bug to get in for my knees.
My partner watched me drag my sad, snotty body out of my track pants and hoody into smart casual clothes, put on makeup, fix my hair. He was like, ‘why are you doing that - you’re sick, you’re going to a doctor, you can look sick.’
I was like, ‘yeah, but I need to make sure I’m taken seriously and have the best chance of considered care. You don’t get that guarantee as a woman. Got to ‘look like’ a real patient.’
I think I read a study years ago about it, but I can’t find it now. But my own anecdotal experience is that if I dress how I feel, I get worse treatment. The impression I get is they think my thoughts/concerns are hypochondria/Dr. Google nonsense.
If I dress how I would for work - casual professional, I’m seen as an insightful patient with some valid speculation about my problem. Male doctors are the worst but I’ve experienced it with women too.
It’s fucked. It’s an obvious privilege too. If you don’t work a white collar job and don’t have those outfits in your wardrobe, or an interest in wearing makeup or whatever - does that mean you’re just always going to get slightly worst treatment than me?
I’m not even getting into the POC aspect, can’t even imagine that on top.
Fucking hell, I’ve literally had to do the same thing when I was experiencing chest pain and heart palpitations! My husband thought I was nuts for putting on makeup and donning “business wear” before he took me to our local urgent care, but I did so I wouldn’t be dismissed due to having anxiety on my records. I knew myself what I was feeling wasn’t anxiety, but if I looked in anyway or shape or form as an “anxious woman” I wouldn’t be taken seriously. I even had to specify we needed to go to the one location that was further away due to their closer location dismissing me for a different issue that was properly looked into at this preferred location.
I was lucky to be listened to in that situation, got an EKG, and a referral out to a cardiologist; but that only happened because I had a younger doctor who wanted to rule out all possibilities. A few months previously I was dealing with numbness in one of my legs and the other urgent care I wanted to avoid literally sent me out the door after looking at me for 10 minutes and doing a leg stretch. The issue persisted and it wasn’t until I went to this same second location that someone actually ran some blood work on me and referred me for an ultrasound on my leg. It just shouldn’t be that hard to be properly treated when both of these experiences revealed issues that needed to be treated.
They let me walk around for 5 months with a broken vertebra pinching my nerves because they figured it was just tendonitis. They were completely baffled that PT was making things worse. I was finally able to get a referral because my dad came with me to an appointment (I was 28). The new doc ordered an MRI first thing and found the vertebra.
Ergh being an adult woman but still needing a ‘real adult’ (read: man) to be taken seriously.
Thankful you could afford MRI! I know someone who was ordered four, and could not afford them, also could not afford a gastroenterologist appointment. Of course, this is charted as noncompliance, so…
It was a work injury so thankfully I didn’t get the bill.
Of course that would be seen as noncompliance, they were choosing to be poor/have crappy insurance. We women need to just stop being so hysterical and pull ourselves up by our boot straps. (So much /s).
Oh wow! I’m so glad it wasn’t at your expense. Did work retaliate for you having to be treated at their insurance expense? It’s not uncommon where I live for people to be dissuaded by fear of unemployment. I wish I were being hyperbolic.
It’s infuriating. We’re treated as if we are naughty children, seeking excuses to play hooky from first grade,.
Yes, they did fire me after they found out it was a broken vertebra. I ended up getting an attorney and while I didn’t get my job back they did have to pay me some lost wages. It was probably for the best though, as I couldn’t have continued to do the job anyway.
Lol, naughty kids trying to play hooky is a perfect way to describe it.
Oh wow! You’ve been through so much! I applaud and admire your grit and durability. You go, friend!
Thanks! :)
Yep. When I was going through extreme tendonitis and also sciatic nerve pain, I made sure I ‘looked wealthy’ so I wouldn’t be accused of drug seeking when asking for pain meds. So dumb.