I apologize in advance if posts like this are not welcome here.

I have a friend circle of 6 guys including me. Before some of us got jobs, we used to play games everyday, hang out together if we are in town. Everyone was chill, enjoyed games more and mostly respected each other to some degree.

After getting jobs we still made time to play and hang out, but not as frequently. I only get time to play games with them on the weekends as my job is in a different time zone. But I still call or text them nearly everyday. Some of them play every single day (kind of addicted to GTA online and valorant for some reason).

But in the last couple of months I have noticed a shift in their behavior. Talking behind each others backs and always getting offended for the silliest of things. This is especially true for those who continued to mindlessly play every single day (they work on the same startup company as well).

I always knew that there was one guy among us who would unnecessarily run his mouth. But I always thought of it as his way of having fun. Mybe it was his way of feeling included. Idk. So I never took any of his ramblings to heart. But everything hits differently now, in a bad way. Every conversation feels like I’m walking on eggshells. Now the others are also starting to become like him.

It’s not just me who thought this way. Another guy who have been besties for a long time with the blabbermouth guy personally called me and told that the whole group feels like it’s infected by something and shared thoughts similar to mine.

I want to call it out, but i’m not sure how to do that in a thoughtful way. I just want them to reflect on themselves, not that I have any right to say that. I’m not afraid of offending them as it’s almost impossible to say anything meaningful without doing so.

Thank you for reading. I hope you have a wonderful day.

  • Whisper06@lemmy.dbzer0.com
    30·
    1 year ago

    Be honest and open about it. Like next time he does it just say like that it’s not cool. If people see the problem guy getting called out then they’ll reflect on themselves.

    • Pons_Aelius@kbin.social
      21·
      1 year ago

      If people see the problem guy getting called out then they’ll reflect on themselves.

      Or they won’t and at least you will know it is time to move on,

        • Pons_Aelius@kbin.social
          121·
          1 year ago

          And what?

          Hoping people will change is a fools game. If a group of people have turned into people you don’t want to be around anymore and you have expressed the issues to them and they do not see the problem or did not attempt to change.

          Cut you losses.

          Find people whose values and outlook you do agree with and invest time creating new friendships and connections.