It is necessary? is it unnecessary? Does it give you the same? What do you think?

  • bionicjoey
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    8 months ago

    I generally use “they” if I’m talking about an unknown or indeterminate person, like “someone forgot their umbrella here. They are going to get wet”, “if one of our clients has a problem with our software, they will tell us”, etc.

    I don’t fuck with “they” for talking about someone specific. I always find it irritating when someone says something like “Alice is going to the shop. They are going to buy a dress”, or “Geoff is going to watch the hockey match. They are a fan of the Habs.” It just sounds clunky and like intentionally being obtuse for the sake of shoehorning in one’s politics.

    • Lemming421@lemmy.world
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      8 months ago

      What if Alice has told you their preferred pronouns are they/them? Would you still call them ‘her’ in spite of their wishes?

      If Geoff is happy with being called ‘he’, then sure, he went to the match.

      I think it only sounds clunky because we’re not so used to it. Imagine a child today being brought up knowing “they” is a perfectly normal individual or group pronoun alongside he and she. In ten years, it won’t sound weird to them (hah) at all.

      • bionicjoey
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        8 months ago

        I personally don’t respect people’s wishes to be called “they” with no alternate pronouns. I don’t allow them to dictate changing the way I use language, and I don’t really buy into the whole “non-binary” thing. IMO it always comes from a place of promoting societally ingrained gender roles, and I don’t agree with that. Like “I don’t want to be called ‘she/her’ because all women like pink and wearing dresses and that doesn’t apply to me”.

        I will call people whichever of he/she they prefer. If someone is presenting as male I will call them he/him, and if they are presenting as female I will call them she/her. If they are presenting but not really passing I’ll still respect that they’re making an effort and call them whichever they are trying to present. Eg. There was a trans girl in my MTG club in uni. She did not pass at all but I’d still use female pronouns since she kept referring to herself as a girl and I’m not trying to make someone feel bad just because they were born with the wrong hormones.