Ex-egg. Turns out wishing you were a girl does work.
Three (and a bit) months into HRT, and seeing the effects more and more :3 Definitely starting to look more feminine, at least from certain angles. I’ve been trying to train myself to maintain a slight smile, rather than my default scowl which doesn’t look good at all. Voice is getting better but still wandering into husky / screechy a bit too often.
I just wish my (somewhat curly) hair would grow out of the awkward phase a bit faster. I suppose I could get regular trims and have it styled professionally, but I think I’d rather have the length sooner.
If I can step up my makeup game a bit, I might actually have a chance of passing soon! (Yeah, right…)
Transitioning kinda sucks, and there’s still a very long way to go. But every day I get more certain that I’m headed in the right direction, and I want more. Even if I am starting to look like my mom.
yeah <3 I’m so happy for you!
Thanks for the reassurance! Yeah, voice is an interesting one. I’m using my new voice all the time now (similarly, I just can’t stand to go back), although it’s still a bit hit-and-miss, and wanders around a lot from day to day as I try out different things. Reactions have ranged from warmer tones and smiles from strangers, to “your voice is different” from people I meet occasionally, and “what do you mean, voice training? Your voice is the same as always” from people I work with. Sadly (?) there isn’t a sir/ma’am distinction here like there is in English, so it’s difficult to know how people perceive me.
Anyway, I went to an on-site event (including people I’m not explicitly out to) the other day in at least fem-adjacent wear with not-very-subtle bra bumps, and didn’t get any awkward questions or comments. So I’m going to assume it’s all in my head and keep pushing my comfort boundaries.
Same. It’s so weird after decades of feeling… wrong… to see someone describing exactly what it’s like.
I can’t help but imagine 1920s cabaret shows when I think of pasties, but that’s an interesting idea. Thanks!
Hehe, that’s encouraging.
Good point. I don’t even really know… so probably not a very rational fear.
Thanks, that makes sense.
Thanks, I think you hit the nail on the head there. I’ve been coasting a bit recently and this was a bit of a “you’re really doing this, right?” moment. Not really trying to boy-mode, but at the same time kind of reluctant to come out to the wider world. Although the idea of not doing it seems worse so… here goes, I guess?
And thank you for all the links!
Nice outfit! I like the scarf. And thanks for sharing <3
Ah yes, the very cis “I wish I was trans” thoughts…
I finally watched The Incel to Trans Pipeline and Inside Mari. Don’t be put off like I was by the title: it’s good. Anyway, I was sufficiently interested to pick up the manga second-hand and read through it at the weekend.
Even knowing the outline from watching the video above, it’s a mindfuck and pretty uncomfortable reading. I loved it though. Then I tried to figure out who I identified with.
First, obviously, on the surface it’s about a man who ends up in the body of a girl, which I guess to an outsider looks kinda like the transfem experience, but actually almost the reverse.
Then, aha! I figure: I’m actually like Mari – I thought I was a man, but let go of that figured out who I want to be in the end. (It surprised me at first that we ended up with Mari and not Fumiko, but on reflection I think that was the right choice). But no, that’s not quite right either.
Then I read the author’s note right at the end. Why does this story have to be about me anyway? There may be elements I relate to, but ultimately I am who I am, and there’s no need to try to fit into any particular box.
Except now my internal “goals” setting seems to have got stuck on “high-school girl” and I’m feeling horribly dysphoric. Gotta learn not to compare myself to others…
Glad you made it back safely. Thanks for sharing your story!
Follow-up to this comment: the youtuber mentioned went downhill very fast. Not recommended.
Thanks, that sounds like a good plan to me.
The doctor should be fine with 10mg weekly, and there are places here that offer self-injections, so worst case I just switch to a different clinic.
Thanks for the detailed response!
I kinda suspected two weeks was way too long after checking the medicine datasheet. The half-life, as you say, is far too short. My doctor doesn’t offer self-injections, so I guess a weekly visit to the clinic is the next thing to try :/
Why do they start everyone on such a bizarre dose?
Aww, she drank all the girl juice. Leave us some!
That is astonishing progress! (And encouraging? Why is everyone else so pretty)
Thank you for sharing <3