The main thing to know is that the owner is a trust fund baby who knows nothing about football, flies to Chico for that heinous bowl haircut, and betrayed the entire Bay Area to gain respect from the racist, piece of crap cadre of billionaire NFL owners who don’t care about their fans or their players—only money.

And the opening bars of AC/DC’s “hells bells” should make the hair stand up on the back of your neck and bestow upon you a feeling of game-long false hope. Or should I say season-long?