• Pow67@alien.topB
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    10 months ago

    If you see opposition players doing weird shit at Old Trafford, it’s because Professor X is mind controlling them from the stands.

    • Swolyguacomole@alien.topB
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      10 months ago

      Maybe Prof should focus on the Man u players not doing weird shit.

      Mind control them to behave around women

    • Feezbull@alien.topB
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      10 months ago

      More likely given the buffoonery of the club you’ll see Onana levitate with the ball while rashford mysteriously runs into defenders again and again but doesn’t try anything else.

      Oh wait…

      • SanctusUnum@alien.topB
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        10 months ago

        And I wish that I were playing, and suddenly I am, and I score the winning goal, and they carry me into the dressing room and there’s Rooney and Beckham and then Posh Spice walks in and…

      • PrestigiousAvocado21@alien.topB
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        10 months ago

        On the bright side for United, maybe he’ll magically sub himself in to score the CL winning goal (and then Posh Spice’s clothes fall off just for the hell of it)

    • SaltyPeter3434@alien.topB
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      10 months ago

      “Casemiro feeds a through ball to Rashford into the box and–OOO that’s a nasty challenge by Romero who’s attempted a flying Chun Li helicopter kick!”