My theory is that they are living in a world of hierarchies and apologizing is admitting a mistake, which takes them down a few levels on the hierarchy of power/popularity.
My theory is that they are living in a world of hierarchies and apologizing is admitting a mistake, which takes them down a few levels on the hierarchy of power/popularity.
Depends on the situation. For instance if my going to work causes someone else to get hurt and cry because I’m triggering their abandonment issues… I’m sorry, I don’t mean to hurt you, I wish it didn’t, but I’m going to have to go to work again.
So if I just do a blanket apology, it will feel hollow since the action MUST happen again.
If I say sorry I hurt your feelings, it also feels hollow because I’m not acknowledging responsibility.
In situations like this displaying empathy and not apologizing are the best because your not making a promise it won’t happen again, but you are trying to help someone navigate the emotional situation, and hopefully build the tools to handle this in the future.