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The original was posted on /r/AmItheAsshole by /u/immabitchimmalover on 2023-09-03 01:54:24.

So my mom has been married 3 times and I attended every wedding, this upcoming wedding would be her 4th. The first was when I was about 5, the second was when I was 9 and the third was when I was 12 (I am 16 right now). She was also in a serious relationship with my bio dad but they were never legally married at all and I can just barely remember the time they were together. Now, I love my mom, and I loved most of her boyfriends/husbands as well, they’re great guys for the most part and I just want to see her happy but at some point it just became too much.

My grandpa walked her down the aisle at all her other weddings but he passed in 2020 so this time she asked if I would do her the honors. I know she was offering as a way to sort of ask for my blessing plus she wanted to make me a part of the ceremony. But the thing is I don’t actually want to give her my blessing this time around.

After being to so many of her weddings I kinda stop believing that “this one is the one for real this time” and that she “promises she’s going to make it work no matter what”. And just from an objective perspective there’s nothing wrong with having a lot of partners, at least not in my opinion. But the thing is my mom tends to rush into relationships before she’s ready and she doesn’t think about consequences that much.

Growing up (especially with number 2) I would start to form a bond with these guys, they were like a dad to me and I started to accept them as part of my family and then one day they’d get a divorce and he’d just disappear and I’d hardly hear from them again. So it’s kinda difficult to accept her current fiance as a new stepdad or even as someone to form a meaningful connection with when it could just end at any moment. I try to believe her when she says he’s the one this time but I just can’t.

I told her that I didn’t really feel like giving her away, plus I told her my opinion on getting married and urged her to please wait a little while longer before deciding to go through with the wedding which might have been a huge mistake. She was really hurt, she tried not to show it but I could tell, I’m pretty sure she cried a little. They didn’t change the date, obviously because that would require too much logistical stuff and changing to already prepared plans, but she stopped talking to me so much about the wedding which made me feel like shit. Now the wedding is coming up, its in November, and I feel like I’ve ruined the whole thing, my mom is obviously uneasy about the day. My aunt is angry at me and accused me of trying to ruin my mom’s special day, my sisters are mad at me because they think that I don’t want her to marry her fiance and they both really like her fiance and get along really well with his daughter, so now they think I’m trying to rob them of their new sister. I don’t really know what to do, I think I’m still right about how she shouldn’t rush the wedding but I think I ruined everything now