My dad was awesome. But he also wasn’t. It’s painful to hear words from coworkers who received things from him that he never gave me. But still, he gave me a lot. He wasn’t perfect. But neither am I. I mourn him leaving me so early. I mourn the things he never gave me and never would have given me. I needed to get this off my chest.
Grief and complexity go hand in hand. Remember that there’s no wrong way to grieve.
The first week is usually the most hectic and confusing. After all the chaos is settled, you’ll have quiet time to reflect. Remember that your father’s death does not mean that the bad things he did don’t matter - it’s tempting to put the dead on a pedestal, but it’s important to recognize that they weren’t perfect, and that’s OK. It’s how we learn and be better in our own lives.