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- cross-posted to:
- [email protected]
An incident which saw two women lock a crying toddler in an aeroplane toilet has sparked an online debate in China on how to manage children in public spaces.
The incident went viral on the Chinese internet after one of the two women, Gou Tingting, posted a video of herself carrying the girl inside the cubicle.
In her post, she presented herself as trying to help others on board, but was swiftly met with backlash.
What?!
Flying is not always a choice, sometimes you have to go somewhere. And yeah, sometimes they cry, it sucks. When flying a pair of earplugs should be in your pocket.
Locking a child in a small room is child abuse. And when done by a stranger how is it not holding someone hostage.
Not arguing with you, it’s just so weird to see someone say that when half my extended family probably haven’t seen the inside of a plane in their lives.
100% of my family besides my wife and dog are far enough away that flying is the only practical way to visit them.
I understand, and me too. What I’m saying is just that when I was growing up, this would have been incomprehensible. At the time I was born, people where I grew up were not automatically entitled to travel outside the country, and the country was like 600 km across the longer way.
This wasn’t so much entitlement as necessity. My aunts moved to get married. My dad and uncles moved for work. Meeting up was always infrequent because it required flying. My grandpa(dad’s side) wasn’t able to make it to my dads wedding and my mom did not get to see her dad on his deathbed.
Just how things were back then.
I think I’m misunderstood, by entitlement I don’t mean feeling entitled, I mean legal entitlement. She had no right to travel, my family is from a former Warsaw Pact state. The border guard would not let you pass.
We all face our hardships, I’m sorry that your family had to face that as well. It must have been heartwrenching.
I hear you. Many people are perfectly content in their own little bubble, and that’s fine. I found travelling far away the few times I did vert impressive. Especially as a dutchy a country like Mongolia is almost incomprehensible… So big and just nature. We travelled a whole day without seeing buildings or people… we also saw poverty in other countries we where not prepared for… It changed my perspective on things.
Lol, this is what I’m talking about.
No, they didn’t stay in their bubble because they were content, my grandma never had a passport, as she couldn’t have gotten one before she was like quite old and the wall fell, and she couldn’t afford to travel abroad even after that.
All I’m saying is that imagine growing up and instead of having the idea of just taking a flight as a life choice, think about flying as a thing that you might be able to afford one day, when you’ve “made it”.
Flying was made very cheap with tax free fuel and sweetheart deals to airline companies. So because of that the world has gotten smaller and flying is a part of that (in not talking holidays) but for distances over ~800km it is faster and usually competitive in price depending on the group size and if driving is an option.
Wages in my home country tends to be so low that a return plane ticket can be months of pay or more for some. I’m talking living your life in the same horizon poor.
You’ve been forced on a plane against your will?! Flying is 100% a choice (a privilege even to afford it), and it’s even more of a choice to bring unruly screaming children/babies that cannot be controlled (not their fault).
Imagine I owned a large Bluetooth speaker that, randomly against my wishes, blasted cacophonous screaming sounds at unpredictable intervals and volumes. I would probably not bring this into a flight because of how embarrassing it would be to disrupt others and ruin their flight. Maybe as the speaker got older in a year or two and could follow instructions and be parented, but not before then.
I wasn’t forced, nice strawman. But families are spread, or a specific Docter is at a specific place… you don’t know the reason. And other modes of transport are not always an option.
So yes, kids can be unruly. Plug your ears. Some airlines even have kid free flights. But the parents have just as much right to be there as you and will do anything to keep their kids quiet… but sometimes that does not work.
Ps: when my wife flew with our 2 year old she had 30 sets of earplugs with her for other people, just in case. But our kid slept the whole flight.
Nice downvotes on your post. Must be really nice people who find it okay to lock a little kid into a small room. One can only hope they never have kids themselves.
To clarify a bit: I DO think that what this woman did was child abuse. But not specifically because she locked the kid in a bathroom. Because she did it for a social media audience.
For some context, I use what is often called “gentle parenting” (although I think it’s just what I would call “parenting if you’re humane and responsive to the needs of a child”). So I would never do this. But I also am very aware of the feeling of helplessness that comes from having a child in distress and having exhausted every remedy I know. I am familiar with the logic that a child who is screaming is doing so for attention, and will stop when their behavior isn’t being tolerated. Putting a child into a time out until they stop doing something is not a radical approach. If I saw someone do this on a plane, I wouldn’t immediately consider it abusing a child.
HOWEVER: if I saw this lady chatting animatedly into her phone’s front facing camera while dragging a distressed kid (to whom she’s not addressing her attention) toward a lavatory, I’d immediately think, ‘Oh fuck: is that one of those people who turns every moment into a social media opportunity? That kid needs rescued.’
I think it’s an omission that the article didn’t recognize this. This woman didn’t just put a kid in a bathroom to try to get them to calm down (dumb idea, but not abuse by itself, imo). She did all that while talking to strangers and saying, ‘Hey everyone! Look at me! Look AT MEEE!’
THAT is what makes it abuse.
No, but it is the vast majority of the time.
Is it? Leisure is about half of the purposes of flying, business and non leisure make up the rest.
I’m going to go out on a limb and say people don’t often bring babies on their business trips.