So last night, while dreaming, I was arguing with someone that “I didn’t used to be this bad at hockey”, and they didn’t believe me. So I pulled up my NHL stats. Between age 35 and 40 I was the Jets 7th Dman, played 42 games, and had 20 points. They still didn’t believe, so they pulled up YouTube looking for video clips. The first hit was “Unrau’s defensive blunder costs Jets game 6 and the series.”
Lmao wat.
From four months ago:
So I had an elaborate, and extended dream last night where I was investigating the Winnipeg Jets.
It started with interviewing Patrick Laine. I asked him: what if the Jets had made you captain and given you some major control of the franchise, would that have enticed you to stay, and if so, what major changes would you have made? And he said: “well, for starters, I would scrap all those boreholes”. Wait what?
So I snuck into Chevy’s office to find that he had drilled a very deep borehole into the earth, and had installed an inclinometer in it. Based on the reading of the inclinometer needle, he would have one of the ladies in the office cut a piece of marble cake at that angle. Then they would analyze the pattern in the cake like an ink blot to determine the future of the franchise.
I spent the rest of the dream trying to find the Winnipeg Free Press reporter to tell him this, but he knew and wouldn’t publish it because he had signed an NDA.