Nothing quite like minimum wage to help you appreciate the affordability of an air sandwich. It costs zero hours of labor (after taxes!) to go hungry – great bargain – plus you can invest all of that saved lunch break time catching up on sleep in the smoking pavilion.

The above is absolutely not based on a terrible and completely wasted early adulthood wrought with minimum wage toil. I’m fine, that hypothetical experience has in no way permanently shaped my worldviews.