• jballs@sh.itjust.worksEnglish
    5123·
    2 years ago

    One time me and my girlfriend (now wife) went to visit my grandparents at their winter home in Texas. I say home, but it was just their RV that they drove down in the winter to avoid the snow. Anyway, It didn’t want to blow up the RV with a huge steamy log, so I held it in for a few days. On the night of the 4th day, we ended up going to a swimming pool. While changing into my swimsuit in the locker room, I realized they had nice toilets there and it would be a good opportunity to unload.

    I don’t know what I was expecting, but for some reason I wasn’t planning on 4 days worth of shit coming out at once. Not like soft, mushy turds, but one big strong firm log that just kind of piled up in the bowl like a shit pile pyramid.

    I tried to give it a courtesy flush before I wiped, as is my custom, but that puppy was too big to go down. Seeing it was in a public toilet, it’s not like I had a plunger or anything. I tried flushing a few more times, but the water was getting dangerously high in the bowl and I didn’t want to deal with a turd water tsunami. So I had no choice but to leave it and duckwalk over to another stall where I could wipe my asshole before fleeing the scene.

    So yeah. I guess my apologies to whoever had to eventually deal with that at the Brownsville Texas RV park circa 2005.

  • PerogiBoiEnglish
    21·
    2 years ago

    Did you know pooping is actually illegal in Montana on Tuesdays?

    • CoderKat@kbin.social
      4·
      2 years ago

      It’s true. I’ve reported so many to the secret poop police. They’re always laughing at first like it’s not serious, up until they break down the bathroom door. Not so funny in a Montana gulag, is it?

      • PerogiBoiEnglish
        1·
        2 years ago

        Bitches be thinking it’s Wednesday. Naw. It’s poop jail for u!!!

  • Ketram@lemmy.worldEnglish
    19·
    2 years ago

    One time I was at a camp in 7th grade for a week (a religious Christian camp) where my friend and I were NOT religious, so we were being bullied. I was so deathly afraid of getting bullied while taking a shit that I didn’t poop until the 6th day. I honestly barely remember it but I snuck out in the night just to take a shit, and it was absolutely horrendous. Pretty sure it felt like trying to pass a big old hard fruit or something, it was the worst and took forever. 2/10 Do not recommend.

    • BeMoreCareful@lemmy.worldEnglish
      41·
      2 years ago

      That’s the worst part about being constipated. Like it should be instant needed relief, but its just a trickle and not a torrent.

  • treeshateorcs@lemmy.mlEnglish
    13·
    2 years ago

    i unironically shit like once a week, maybe two times a week max. so i don’t understand what the fuss is all about

    • Mulkor@lemmy.worldEnglish
      9·
      2 years ago

      Despite what the other comments say, this can be perfectly acceptable if this is has always been usual for you.

      • Yrt@feddit.deEnglish
        2·
        2 years ago

        Yep, normal range is 3x a day to every 3 days. More or less is possible but that should be checked by a doctor. If it was always once every 5-7 days it’s probably nothing and normal for you. If something changes about the rhythm then go see a doctor and that can mean you’re one of the once every 3 days people and now you poop daily. Even if it’s inside the range, go see a doctor!

        And one myth: if your body is the slow type like every 2-3 days or even 3-5 days fibre and stuff won’t help, it’s just a heavier poop (in weight) after 5 days than usual.

    • Littleborat@feddit.deEnglish
      1·
      2 years ago

      My brother was a weird child and did that too. The smell is compressed into one sitting if you did not know.

    • MajorMajormajormajorEnglish
      1·
      2 years ago

      I find that crazy, I go twice a day usually so the thought of waiting a week in between shits is horrifying. Not being able to go for a day or two is super painful, a week would kill me lol.

  • DoubleVV@sh.itjust.worksEnglish
    12·
    2 years ago

    I hate turc style toilets. And as a son of Moroccan immigrant we always went to Morocco 2 months a year. We were alternating between my grandmother’s house (with turc style toilets) and our house (Western style toilets) every 3 or 4 days. I’ve always tried my best to take a dump in our house. But for some reason we once stayed at my grandmother’s house for like 10 days. It was horrible to live through. I made the trip back to our house just to unload myself. A fricking log came out. Very very painful. As I was losing weight, I stopped in the middle of it because I felt different kind of pain. I was fricking bleeding. So I finished very painfully and I took my time to not do more damage. It was still hurting avec a week. TL;DR : I bled from my anus because I’m afraid of turc style toilets.

    • Luke@lemmy.mlEnglish
      2·
      2 years ago

      I’m not familiar with turc style toilets, so I did a Google, and I’m still not sure what I’m looking at here. Could you explain how it works? I figure you are supposed to squat over it (which sounds sensible, I mean westerners buy those goofy squatty potty things to awkwardly emulate this) but I don’t understand what the bucket is for? Or why there’s a spigot at the floor level a meter away from the toilet?

      Please have mercy on a confused westerner who wants to understand 😅

      • DoubleVV@sh.itjust.worksEnglish
        1·
        2 years ago

        It’s very simple. You squat over a tiny hole (which get clogged easily) and then you wash yourself with water. Of course as a westerner too, I was using toilet paper (which clogged the thing more), so yeah fun times.