Image description: 4 panel comic titled If Trans People Said the Things Cis People Tell Them.
Panel one has an androgynous individual talking to a woman. The androgynous individual, “To me, you are 100% a girl, you know?” The woman has a look of confusion and disgust and responds with, “Wow, thanks.”
Panel two has the same androgynous individual speaking with a man. The androgynous individual is saying, “It’s so incredibly you look just like an actual boy!” The man is rubbing the back of his head in nervous confusion and says, “Yeah, I… am one?”
Panel three has the androgynous individual speaking with someone of ambiguous gender. The androgynous individual says, “I would never have guessed you were cis! Congratulations!” The other person is looking at them with an expression of confusion and concern.
Panel four has the androgynous individual speaking to a man. The androgynous individual says, “I think you are so brave for being who you are.” The man is frowning at them.
The comic is credited to @assignedmale on Facebook, Twitter and Tumblr and SophieLabelledraws on YouTube. Their merch is at assignedmale.etsy.com and Pateron is at patreon.com/sophielabelle
Ally question, is it actually offensive to consider someone brave for coming out as trans? Feels like that takes alot of courage.
No but there’s a couple subtlies here. If you are calling someone brave, the context is important. It can come off as condescending. Also coming out isn’t an all or nothing thing, see here.
Also in this comic they aren’t saying they are brave for coming out. They are saying they are brave for being cis. The underlying assumption there being that being cis or trans is a choice that one can be brave for.
@BiNonBi. people saying supportive things. how refreshing. don’t let the perfect be the enemy of the good. and don’t expect any people, on any topic, to always say exactly what yu’d like them to. it won’t happen. i can guarantee it.
I’m sorry, is saying to a trans person that they did a great job passing, rude? I thought it would be validating.
Yes, it’s rude, because of all of the things it implies. It assumes our goal is to hide our trans identity, as if that’s something we all want to do. It assumes that looking cis is better than looking trans, because otherwise it wouldn’t be a compliment.
In short, whilst it’s unlikely to hurt the person you’re saying it to, it sustains a lot of ideas assumptions that hurt all trans people
Is it bad that I wish someone would say “I never would have guessed you were trans” after I come out to them or drop my voice? I need validation on being stealth.
Nope. But it might get old the nth time or if you didn’t do something you think shouldn’t of outed you.
It’s kind of the paradox of being stealth. If you are successful no one notices. So you don’t get feedback that you are successful.
![if things were reversed[¿cisphobia? satire]](https://i.imgur.com/yOgCEiD.png){kind=link}