Background:

I’m in my 40s and I’ve always sort of beaten myself up over not being an avid reader. I go through phases where I read a bunch, sometimes I’ll finish a book in a months time, sometimes start a book and forget it, sometimes it seems like I go literally years without really getting into any book at all. But I still accumulate them.

Because of how important reading is and now I “fail” to prioritize it, I’ve always found myself in a poor relationship with reading. I feel this artificial pressure to read things that are only important and will somehow make me more useful. I feel this artificial pressure to start one book and read it to the end. I feel this artificial pressure to become a changed person by fully investing every bit of info from every book.

I’ve been learning that these pressures are untenable.

I’ve also noticed that I partake in all kinds of things without the same expectations: tv shows, games, podcasts, media and news outlets, social media, etc.

Right now I have 6 books that I am actively reading, and I am trying to remember that it’s for enjoyment and not some high level goal. Someone told me if I read 10 pages a day I would finish about 10 books a year. I found this so encouraging.

Taking the pressure off of reading has really helped me get more productive at reading, and I think it will help me convert my habit into a truly fruitful one.

So now I ask you:

  • What are your reading habits like?
  • What do you like to read?
  • What kind of stage of life are you in, and how does that affect it?
  • Have you made any changes, positive or negative, to your reading habits?
  • What else?
  • PonyOfWar@pawb.social
    link
    fedilink
    arrow-up
    24
    ·
    1 month ago

    I read books for personal enjoyment, basically never for learning or self-improvement or anything like that. I only ever read one book at a time and mostly in the evening before going to sleep.

    I’m in my early thirties. My reading speed varies quite a lot based on the book and my mood, but I’ve definitely noticed that I’ve become “worse” at reading in recent years. Too many digital distractions I guess. That said, if I do manage to read for 2 hours before going to sleep, I sleep so much better than if I watch a movie or doomscroll on Lemmy or whatever.

    I mostly read sci-fi and fantasy, sometimes historical novels. I think this year I’ve finished 4 books so far, and dropped one quarter-way through. There were definitely years where I’ve managed way more.

    • kratoz29@lemm.ee
      link
      fedilink
      English
      arrow-up
      4
      arrow-down
      1
      ·
      1 month ago

      if I watch a movie or doomscroll on Lemmy

      Are you telling me we really made Lemmy that good to be as good bad as Reddit? 🤯

  • iii@mander.xyz
    link
    fedilink
    English
    arrow-up
    16
    ·
    1 month ago

    I finish maybe 5 books a year. The library makes it so there’s a “deadline”, that helps.

    I also don’t mind picking up a book, and returning it after a few chapters if I realise I don’t like it.

    It shouldn’t feel like a chore.

    • andyortlieb@lemmy.sdf.orgOP
      link
      fedilink
      arrow-up
      2
      ·
      1 month ago

      Utilizing the library is a good idea, I should really do they more. I know in the US they need our support too.

      • skulblaka@sh.itjust.works
        link
        fedilink
        arrow-up
        2
        ·
        1 month ago

        I use my local library from my phone with the Libby app. I don’t know if this benefits them as much as going there in person does. I did go there to get a library card though, you need one to sign up in the app.

        But they have a great catalog of ebooks that I can borrow from, I’ve read the bulk of The Dresden Files that way recently and I’m about to finish it if the last two books ever come off reservation.

  • FourPacketsOfPeanuts@lemmy.world
    link
    fedilink
    arrow-up
    13
    ·
    edit-2
    1 month ago

    For me getting an alarm clock made a difference. Because that nullified my brains weak excuse that I needed my phone by my bed “for an alarm”. No I didn’t. People have woken up perfectly reliably for years before smartphones. So I got an alarm clock. And that made it easier to turn going to bed into calm reading time instead of doom scrolling (by leaving my phone charging in other room). And that’s made a big difference, not only to quality of reading but also general mood.

    • SassyRamen@lemmy.world
      link
      fedilink
      arrow-up
      5
      ·
      1 month ago

      Wow! That’s it, tomorrow I’m buying an alarm clock! Reading your comment made me realize how unhealthy it is to doom scroll myself to sleep! Thanks for the wake up!

      • andyortlieb@lemmy.sdf.orgOP
        link
        fedilink
        arrow-up
        2
        ·
        1 month ago

        Lately I have been trying to notice my doom scrolling actually using it as a cue to convert that energy into reading something I’m interested in.

        I’m trying to quit scrolling like I quit smoking decades ago: with intentional anger for being controlled and then redirection.

    • nondescripthandle@lemmy.dbzer0.com
      link
      fedilink
      arrow-up
      1
      ·
      1 month ago

      I still use my phone for an alarm but it’s always far away from my bed because if I can reach my alarm without having to stand up im liable to keep sleeping.

  • Mister Neon@lemmy.world
    link
    fedilink
    arrow-up
    11
    ·
    edit-2
    1 month ago
    1. My reading habits are like everyone of my hobbies, I’m obsessed for a week then move on to a new pursuit then come back to reading several months later.
    2. I read text books about Aztec history.
    3. I’m a year away from 40 and I’m coming to terms with being alone for the rest of my life (which is exactly the same leading up to this point).
    4. I bought a book stand I can adjust and wheel around.
    5. Stop caring what other people think and just read when you feel like it. You’re overthinking this.
  • socsa@piefed.social
    link
    fedilink
    English
    arrow-up
    7
    ·
    1 month ago

    I would read like 60 or 70 books a year as a kid. I have the BOOK IT records to prove it. These days it’s like 10. I don’t think there is any shame in not reading per-se as long as you are pursuing other intellectual activities or hobbies.

    I think people put too much emphasis on reading as some idealized time sink. There are lots of productive ways to spend free time and reading is one of them. When you are a kid you have fewer options but as an adult cooking or wood working or gardening can be a fine form of intellectual stimulation.

    • MajorMajormajormajor
      link
      fedilink
      arrow-up
      3
      ·
      1 month ago

      One counterpoint I would have to those other hobbies (I enjoy all of them, so no disrespect to them or practitioners of them) is they don’t expose a person to new ideas as easily. Reading is great for getting a potential new perspective on something, or just absorbing new ideas in general.

      You can always combine both by reading up on another hobby you have, best of both worlds so to speak.

  • Droggelbecher@lemmy.world
    link
    fedilink
    arrow-up
    6
    ·
    1 month ago

    To preface, you are not a worse person if you don’t like to read. There’s so many different ways to learn or grow nowadays, you don’t need to force yourself to do it through a medium you don’t enjoy.

    That said, I’m a person who DOES enjoy reading, but struggles to do it anyway for some reason. If that’s you as well, I get you. And I’d say it’s worth it.

    In general, figuring out WHY you want to read will impact how to best work it into your life. Is it for entertainment, mindfulness, to get a better attention span, to chill out, etc. I do it for calming down mixed with enjoyment, and that impacts how I work it into my day.

    What helped me was working it into my routine. I read at night. I don’t have a set schedule, I teach night school some nights, and I’m working on a masters thesis.

    My fixed point every day: some time when I feel ready (a fixed time would stress me out), I turn off my laptop, text my partner good night, and put my phone away. I get ready for bed. What follows is designated reading time. I read for as long as I enjoy it, am not too tired, and can still focus. If I’m not getting tired, I’ll dim the lights at some point. Sometimes, I read one page, sometimes 50. If you force it, it won’t be enjoyable.

    I also always carry the book and try to read while I’m on the tram or train. Especially for somewhat longer journeys, which I take somewhat regularly, I get a lot of chill reading done like that. But that’s pretty specific to my situation as I’m a public transport commuter and have a partner that lives 4 train hours away.

    • andyortlieb@lemmy.sdf.orgOP
      link
      fedilink
      arrow-up
      1
      ·
      1 month ago

      I have, on a few occasions, rebooted my reading habit from traveling by airplane.

      I have found that if I do everything I can to feel as good as possible before a flight, and bring a book in my carry on, it’s one of the rare situations that there is nothing pulling me away from reading. I went somewhere for work last month and I finished 2 books on that trip. That made me really happy and motivated to keep it alive.

  • 🇰 🌀 🇱 🇦 🇳 🇦 🇰 ℹ️@yiffit.net
    link
    fedilink
    English
    arrow-up
    6
    ·
    edit-2
    1 month ago

    I will be 40 in February. I read daily. But what I read daily is this shit. Posts and comments. Memes and news articles. Maybe someone’s fanfic on Tumblr.

    Been getting into furry focused visual novels after getting bored and checking out Adastra since I had heard of it years ago and never actually played it, and I just haven’t been able to get enough of Howlie’s work since (finish The Smoke Room so you can get back on Khemia, please! 😩)

    I like sci-fi and romance. Adastra was both and has been the best fucking thing I’ve ever read.

    I haven’t read an honest to God book since Ready Player One initially came out.

  • KyuubiNoKitsune@lemmy.blahaj.zone
    link
    fedilink
    arrow-up
    6
    ·
    edit-2
    1 month ago

    I read my first book in 11 years, I finished it 2 weeks ago. It’s The Expanse. I loved the series and someone gifted me the first book.

    My trick? I commute by train and have my book with me everywhere I go. If there’s waiting to be done, there’s reading time.

  • Mr_Blott@feddit.uk
    link
    fedilink
    arrow-up
    6
    ·
    1 month ago

    I love books

    My biggest recommendation is to avoid asking for recommendations online, particularly in reading - centric communities.

    People love to pretend their favourite books are classical just through sheer pretentiousness

    The most genuine people you’ll find in life are the ones that are perfectly happy to admit they fucking love a trashy thriller

  • QDgwZjQYdfbnMdMNQ@lemmy.cafe
    link
    fedilink
    English
    arrow-up
    5
    ·
    1 month ago

    I tend to go through phases in which whenever I find a bunch of books I’m really interested in, I’ll read a ton. But, once I finish those, I’ll read less for a while. I think my top speed if I’m really invested in what I’m reading is around 800 pages a day, but I never sustain that for long because I run out of book.

    I pretty much exclusively read fantasy, with a focus on books with hard magic systems, progression elements, and/or some sort of cultivation (which itself is a progression element).

    When I was a kid, I struggled with reading for years because I wasn’t interested in anything I read at school. I only really started reading a ton when I found books I was interested in (fantasy), which in turn made me a lot better at reading from all the practice.

    Somewhat more recently, I’ve started reading webnovels in between traditionally published books, which is nice because you get a continuous drip of content. I also generally just read on my phone, as it’s very convenient to pop out a book wherever I am. I like physical books too, but I don’t tend to get through them as fast because I can’t fit them in my pocket and take them with me everywhere.

    My experience is that if you want to develop a habit of reading a lot, you should focus on finding something you enjoy, as it’s a lot easier to make a habit of doing something you like than something you don’t like.

    • heatofignition@lemmy.world
      link
      fedilink
      arrow-up
      2
      ·
      1 month ago

      You just described my reading habits pretty precisely…quick, give me a new series to read that fits those descriptions

      • QDgwZjQYdfbnMdMNQ@lemmy.cafe
        link
        fedilink
        English
        arrow-up
        1
        ·
        29 days ago

        Well, it’s a bit late to be considered quick, but here’s some of my favorite series that I’ve read recently:

        • Firebrand by Quill - magic school story about a boy who lives in a Roman inspired setting. The story also extends a few books after his graduation from school, which I liked.
        • Mother of Learning by nobody103 - also takes place in a magic school, but in a very different setting. It’s also a time loop story and one of the best series I’ve ever read.
        • Ave Xia Rem Y by Mat Haz - pretty standard Xianxia story, but very well written. It’s still ongoing, but it’s older, so there’s a lot of free chapters already out and arcs finished.
        • Mage Errant by John Bierce - another magic school type story (evidently I really like those), with a really interesting magic system and world building. John Bierce also has a patreon with a bunch of short stories, which I enjoy, and all his books have a bunch of recommendations for other stories at the end, which I’ve used to find good stuff in the past.
        • Weirkey Chronicles by Sarah Lin - This story focuses a bit more of character development than I usually prefer, but the combat, characters, setting, and magic are all great. It has a unique take on cultivation, where your power is built as a “soulhome” inside your soul, and the construction of that home gives various advantages and disadvantages along with your powers.
        • Paranoid Mage by InadvisablyCompelled - this is one of the few urban fantasy books that I’ve really liked. The protagonist finds out he’s a mage at like 30 or something, but the magical government is even more tyranical than the non-magical one, so he goes on the run and tries to fight back however he can. He often makes do by making clever use of his space magic.
        • The Iron Teeth by Clear Madness - This story has a goblin protagonist, and it does a good job of showing how he thinks differently from a human. I also really like the worldbuilding and how the magic systems work and are limited.
  • LoganNineFingers
    link
    fedilink
    arrow-up
    4
    ·
    1 month ago

    Got to around 30 yrs old

    I realized that I, on paper, really like non-fiction books. In practice, I really only like fantasy and space operas (different than sci-fi)

    Every night before bed, I read 10 pages or a chapter. Whichever comes first. Can always read more, but not less.

    So to answer,

    Almost every night Fantasy / space opera Mid 30s, father I’ve added audiobooks to my commute The most important part (I think) is figuring out what you like, and then setting a small but achievable routine

  • sntx@lemm.ee
    link
    fedilink
    arrow-up
    4
    ·
    1 month ago

    What are your reading habits like?

    When I pick up a book I typically get hooked after ten to fifteen pages and then complete it on the same day (think ~100s of pages in hours, ~1000s pages in days). This often results in me semi-self-destructively finishing the book and then not touching a book for at least a few days as I have to deal with the things I neglected while reading.

    What do you like to read?

    Mostly Novels

    What kind of stage of life are you in, and how does that affect it?

    Have you made any changes, positive or negative, to your reading habits?

    I went from physical books to reading a lot on my phone. This allows me to read easily and blend in better while in public. It comes with the advantage that I break up big monolouthic reading sessions with small micro breaks.

    What else?

    Even though it’s somewhat obvious: I also like to get books that aren’t in my native tongue, I find that reading teaches you a lot about the application of a language.

  • fuckwit_mcbumcrumble@lemmy.dbzer0.com
    link
    fedilink
    English
    arrow-up
    4
    ·
    1 month ago

    Because of how important reading is

    Reading itself isn’t what’s important, it’s mental stimulation that is. And more importantly stimulating different parts of the brain.

    • vividspecter@lemm.ee
      link
      fedilink
      arrow-up
      2
      arrow-down
      1
      ·
      1 month ago

      Reading itself isn’t what’s important, it’s mental stimulation that is. And more importantly stimulating different parts of the brain.

      It’s important if you want to understand how the world works on a deeper level. There’s a reason that all scientific research is primarily presented in the written form.

      Although I assume OP is talking about fiction which is a different matter.

  • Libb@jlai.lu
    link
    fedilink
    arrow-up
    4
    ·
    1 month ago

    What else?

    My only advice would be these two:

    1. Don’t be afraid or ashamed to start and to not finish a book. It’s fine and it’s legit. There is no moral obligation on your part as a reader to finish a book you don’t enjoy. Just close it and try another one.
    2. Don’t be afraid to reopen a book you did not like before. We all change. So do our preferences. It’s not guaranteed (decades later, and after many repeated attempts, I still do not enjoy reading Marcel Proust) but some of your taste will indeed change with time. A few of the books I cherish today (in my 50s) were among the ‘wtf is that thing?’ the first time I tried to read them decades ago. Like, really.

    What are your reading habits like?

    • I read at every single opportunity I have. I never waste my time scrolling on my phone or watching TV (we don’t have a TV set). For me, doom scrolling is not even a temptation as I always have a (much more interesting) book with me. And when I don’t read and still don’t want to ‘waste’ my time looking at my phone, I will sketch in my pocket notebook instead. No matter where I am.
    • I read at any time of the day/evening/night. I have no fix work-schedule (I’m my own boss).
    • There are books waiting for me to grab them everywhere at our place. I mean not neatly stored in a bookshelf but lying in places where I will see them (my spouse is OK with that). I just checked, there are four books (one essay, one novel, a children book and a how-to guide) just here on my desk. Plus two dictionaries. And my personal diary which is another book I regularly re-read.
    • I always have more than one book started at the same time. So I can change book if I don’t feel like reading one in particular.
    • When I don’t want to read, I don’t read. That’s not a job. I very much like going out for long walks too and those will often take precedence over reading (but I will have a pocket book and a sketchbook with me, just in case).
    • I recently quit reading ebooks almost completely to read printed books (want to know why? check the link to my blog in my profile, there are three posts talking about that choice).
    • I always take notes while reading, no matter the type of book. I carry a bunch of A6 index cards within each book and a ballpoint pen. Cards on which i write the page number and a short note/comment/quote. I keep all those notes organized in a box which later helps me easily and quickly go through all what I read to find whatever I am looking for and also often find new ideas while doing so (wanna know more about that card thing? Search what is a Zettelkasten, aka a fancy German word to describe a box with a large stack of somewhat organized but not too organized index cards in it, it’s like a second brain, just better).

    What do you like to read?

    Essays, poetry, novels, phylosophy, history, short stories, sociology,… Younger, I used to read a lot of plays (Racine, Shakespeare, Godot,…). I read in French and in English (starting to read in Spanish too, but I still have a lot to learn). I love all eras, from antiquity to very contemporary works. I like reading children books a lot too, even though I’m 50+ and my spouse and I have no children. Some of those books are pure masterpieces, text as well as illustrations.

    The thing that may help you get into reading more (beside not forcing yourself to finish one in particular) is to try to widen your horizon by trying stuff you would not normally read.

    Say you like fantasy, ok, try horror instead. Or scifi. Or historical romance. Or essays. And so on. Just keep in mind you’re trying it, don’t force it if you don’t like it. To save money, use your public library: it’s probably free ;)

    What kind of stage of life are you in, and how does that affect it?

    Not sure to understand the question.

    50+ I now need glasses to read. Beside that… I still try to read widely and to never let anyone’s expectations about what some dude like me (my age, my genre, race, social situation, whatever) is supposed to be reading and enjoying.

    Have you made any changes, positive or negative, to your reading habits?

    Positive: like I said, recently I quit reading ebooks and went back to good old paper. Zero regret, quite the contrary: I’m more tranquil. Once again, feel free to check my little (and seldom updated) blog if you’re curious to know more about that ;)

    Negative: I sometimes read less, out of sheer laziness. I always regret it.