I’m not really looking to hear from people who don’t think this way, with answers like “insecurity”, “toxic masculinity”, etc. I want to hear answers from men who really detest men who sit to pee.

Follow-up questions:

  • when you have to piss while shitting, do you stand up turn around and piss on your shit and then sit back down to finish shitting?
  • are you ever groggy in the morning?
  • how clean is your toilet and surrounding floor, and whose job is cleaning it?
  • what are your true passions in life?
  • Cyborganism
    12812·
    2 months ago

    Guys who do diss other guys for not peeing standing up have major self esteem issues or insecurities.

    I’m a man and I pee sitting down because:

    • it’s more comfortable
    • it doesn’t splash pee water everywhere all over the toilet bowl and the floor or my pants.
    • can access the toilet paper easier to wipe clean instead of just shaking it and having a wet pee stain on my underwear
    • I have my hands free to use my phone
    • I can also fight anyone that might barge in an try to assault me while I pee without peeing on myself so it’s a tactical defense position.
    • JohnnyCanuck
      567·
      2 months ago

      Real men sit to pee so they don’t have to clean their own piss up later.

      Whenever I talk about this, some asshat will come along and make a comment about sitting on a tree. No, dumbass, I don’t sit to pee on a tree. Or a urinal. I sit to pee on my toilet at home so I can tell you what an idiot you are while I’m pissing just to prove how manly I am.

      • almar_quigley@lemmy.world
        45·
        2 months ago

        Real men pee however they want and make sure not to leave a mess for the next bathroom user. Standing or sitting has nothing to do with masculinity.

      • Cyborganism
        91·
        2 months ago

        Hahahahahaha! “dO yOu SiT aT a UrInAl Or On A tReE?” That is some wrinkle-free brain logic right there.

    • zcd
      14·
      2 months ago

      Never turn your back to the bathroom door bro

      • Cyborganism
        31·
        2 months ago

        So do you pee with your dick bent backwards between your butt cheeks to piss in the bowl while you face the door?

    • Agrivar@lemmy.world
      6·
      2 months ago

      I can also fight anyone that might barge in an try to assault me while I pee without peeing on myself so it’s a tactical defense position.

      Bruh. You’re giving up your best offensive maneuver by sitting down! You piss AT your attacker!

      • ricecake@sh.itjust.works
        21·
        2 months ago

        Usually about 15 to 20 seconds. I’ve been known to check my phone while standing to pee, it really just depends on what I’m doing It’s not like I’m doing a lot on my phone while peeing.

    • GBU_28@lemm.eeEnglish
      4·
      2 months ago

      You fool, the pee is to be used as a standoff weapon to assert space and give time to determine your strategy.

      • CyborganismEnglish
        5·
        2 months ago

        If your attacker comes from behind, which is the most likely scenario, you’ll be caught off guard with both hands busy holding your junk. All they gotta do is shake you a little for you to be covered in your own piss. Checkmate.

        • GBU_28@lemm.eeEnglish
          3·
          2 months ago

          Learning the garden sprinkler technique is dick management 101.

          • Cyborganism
            2·
            2 months ago

            The one that slaps the water that goes

            Tsh tsh tsh tsh tsh

            TRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRR

    • timroerstroem@feddit.dk
      3·
      2 months ago

      I’m a man and I pee sitting down because:

      it’s more comfortable

      Agreed, I will generally sit down.

      It’s solely a matter of comfort and/or convenience:

      • No. 2: Toilet (obviously, I hope).
      • No. 1 on the road or at the pub: Urinal or standing elsewhere.
      • No. 1 otherwise: sit down and relax.
    • Kusimulkku@lemm.ee
      1·
      2 months ago

      it’s more comfortable

      Idk I just don’t think it’s comfortable to sit down and stand up for such a quick thing, not to mention pull my pants down

  • Boozilla@lemmy.worldEnglish
    521·
    2 months ago

    “What is that? An umbrella? Are you afraid of a little rain? Are you gay? What’s the umbrella for, so you can stick it up your ass?”

    I’m ripping off Bill Burr here. Macho men are drooling morons who die at age 54. Why ask them their opinion on anything?

  • sin_free_for_00_days@sopuli.xyz
    411·
    2 months ago

    I don’t know who y’all hang out with, but my friends for decades have given each other shit for anything we can possibly think of. It’s a form of male bonding.

  • breadsmasher@lemmy.worldEnglish
    38·
    2 months ago

    I cant ever recall a time I have questioned, or been questioned, as to why a guy would sit to pee. I sit at home because its more comfortable. I stand at public toilets because the seats are gross

    • Bob Robertson IX @discuss.tchncs.deEnglish
      7·
      2 months ago

      I’ve only been questioned once about sitting to pee… it was after about 10 years of being married. My wife asked one day if I sit while peeing at home, and when I told her that I do she said “I’ve always wondered why there isn’t pee all over our bathrooms”.

      • Halosheep@lemm.ee
        3·
        2 months ago

        This leads me to two questions:

        Do you guys often miss while standing and, if you do, not clean up after?

        When you’re sitting do you not have an issue with the pee splashing UP the side of the bowl onto the seat? I have this happen often.

        • Bob Robertson IX @discuss.tchncs.deEnglish
          3·
          2 months ago

          Do you guys often miss while standing and, if you do, not clean up after?

          Yes… and, sadly, not always. Just take a look around a urinal (which shouldn’t be difficult at all to miss) and I don’t think this is just a ‘me’ issue.

          When you’re sitting do you not have an issue with the pee splashing UP the side of the bowl onto the seat? I have this happen often.

          The biggest issue I typically have is the toilet water is really cold if I accidentally hang down into it, but I normally don’t have a problem with pee hitting the sides of the bowl.

          edit: formatting

            • Albbi
              31·
              2 months ago

              Yours doesn’t do that? I thought everybody did that because if you submerge it you can pee really quietly.

  • doggle@lemmy.dbzer0.com
    261·
    2 months ago

    You’re not going to hear from men who actually do this because they don’t have a good reason and aren’t typically comfortable with the kind of introspection the question demands.

    Some people are exclusionary pricks who look for excuses to judge others. They don’t have or need a reason. It’s bullying.

    • GottaKnowYourCHKN@lemmy.world
      5·
      2 months ago

      Because the answer is that a lot of men don’t want to challenge their idea of masculinity. Women sit down to pee. If man sits to pee, it just challenges their whole idea of masculinity and it’s easier to get other men to comform than he introspective

      • quafeinum@lemmy.world
        2·
        2 months ago

        If the idea of masculinity is getting challenged by sitting down to pee theres a whole shit ton of other more urgent problems mate 😹

  • stinerman [Ohio]@midwest.socialEnglish
    241·
    2 months ago

    I want to hear answers from men who really detest men who sit to pee.

    I fear that you will not many of these kinds of people on Lemmy. If you really want a good answer, you’d have to post it somewhere like Twitter or Truth Social.

  • Bob Robertson IX @discuss.tchncs.deEnglish
    221·
    2 months ago

    I always sit to pee when I’m at home, mostly so I don’t have to worry about spray/drippage/seat positions, but I also believe that men have this amazing power where we have the ability to stand and pee… and I think the biggest flex you can make when you have amazing power is to only use that power when it makes sense. Restraint is power.

      • Bob Robertson IX @discuss.tchncs.deEnglish
        4·
        2 months ago

        No, more like using a pen to write about how important the 2nd amendment is, without actually needing to own a gun first.

        But, like, what point do you think I was trying to make? That if I don’t sit down to pee then I won’t be able to pee standing? I’m really confused at your attempt to shoehorn politics into a conversation about piss.

        • ZagamTheVile@lemmy.world
          54·
          2 months ago

          I was being goofy. Of course it doesn’t make sense. Jesus, Lemmy has gotten as bad as reddit. It’s all people ready to fight at the drop of a hat.

          • kitnaht@lemmy.world
            22·
            2 months ago

            It’s okay to simply be wrong and admit it you know. Much more honorable as well. Being silly with a political joke, is still being political.

              • kitnaht@lemmy.world
                52·
                2 months ago

                Hah, I’m totally making an assumption here, but I’m willing to bet you’re the type who tests the temperature of the room by saying something mildly political like this, and then if things go well, you’ve successfully hijacked a conversation - and if they don’t, you just back off and pull the “it was just a joke, I was being funny”…

                Unfortunately you backed yourself into a corner here because the “it was just a joke!” doesn’t really land well when you’re trying to inject politics into a conversation that has literally nothing to do with them. I know I’m kinda hard calling you out here, but I’m just saying - it’s not a good look.

                • ZagamTheVile@lemmy.world
                  37·
                  2 months ago

                  That’s a lot and I’m not going to read it. I promise you that I care exactly as much about your opinion as you do mine. You should go touch grass if you’re so worked up that you can write two paragraphs moaning about a joke you didn’t get. It’s guys like you give us guys that sit down to pee a bad name.

      • mrcleanup@lemmy.world
        2·
        2 months ago

        More like being responsible with guns so people don’t argue we can’t afford to leave the second amendment unrestrained.

  • Mister Neon@lemmy.world
    233·
    2 months ago

    As a man WHY THE FUCK ARE YOU TELLING ME HOW YOU PEE!?! What god damn conversation is going on!?! How the hell did this come up? We don’t normally talk about this!

    My true passion in life is Aztec history.

    • recapitated@lemmy.worldOP
      62·
      2 months ago

      We don’t normally talk about this!

      We should though! We should just not be shit bags about it. Sharing & seeking info rather than having a weird chauvinistic view on how pee exits bodies.

      • Mister Neon@lemmy.world
        51·
        2 months ago

        There’s nothing chauvinistic about it! I just don’t want to know or care about what you do in the bathroom. We’re not going to have a conversation about it. JUST WASH YOUR HANDS!

        • LengAwaits@lemmy.world
          6·
          2 months ago

          I wiped my ass with a wadded up ball of 25 toilet paper squares for years because no one wanted to tell me about more efficient and effective ways to do it. Bathroom knowledge is like your paycheck. They say you shouldn’t talk about it with your peers, but it needs to be talked about.

          These days I can clean my whole ass, even on the most explosive days, with less than 10 squares, and I’m saving so much money.

  • johannesvanderwhales@lemmy.world
    18·
    2 months ago

    I mostly sit down when I pee because my cat likes to spend quality time when I’m on the toilet and he gets upset if into in the bathroom and don’t sit down.

    Remember manliness is not caring about how other people define manliness.

  • AlDente@sh.itjust.worksEnglish
    17·
    2 months ago

    I always prefer to sit unless I’m in a huge hurry. It’s called a restroom for a reason. I’m going to take a break, browse Lemmy or something, and otherwise “rest”. I’ll return to work when I’m ready.

    What really pisses me off is when I hear someone enter another stall to take a standing piss. They rarely put the seat up and always get pee all over everything. If you’re going to stand, use a urinal. There’s nothing more pathetic than being afraid to whip your dick out beside your fellow man, and instead, choose to piss on the place where others want to take a sit.

  • jpreston2005@lemmy.world
    15·
    2 months ago

    When I was in medical school, I had to drop a deuce during a break between lectures. While I was in there, performing spectacularly, some other guy came into the restroom (situated just outside the lecture hall) and shouted “Is somebody takin’ a shit in here!?”

    and I was just like, “…yeah, where else would I do it?”

    But I feel like that guy who openly questioned why someone would shit in a bathroom, is exactly the same type of guy that would question someones masculinity over how they choose to take a piss.

  • bahbah23@lemmy.world
    13·
    2 months ago

    when you have to piss while shitting, do you stand up turn around and piss on your shit and then sit back down to finish shitting?

    I tried this once when I was probably about two or three years old. It did not go well.

  • MrJameGumb@lemmy.world
    164·
    2 months ago

    Is this still a thing that people get upset about though? Personally I think a man sitting down just to pee is kind of silly, but I certainly wouldn’t make fun or get upset about it. I think the last time I heard someone make a joke about men sitting to pee was like 15 years ago lol

    • recapitated@lemmy.worldOP
      9·
      2 months ago

      I will say the option to stand up is one of my favorite male privileges, but I’m also aware that such a petty thing to fav probably indicates my lack of perspective. But it is incredibly convenient in gross places and nowhere places.

      • tacosanonymous@lemm.ee
        8·
        2 months ago

        I only stand in public at urinals.

        Having to clean my own bathroom put a stop to the standing at home.