• ChicoSuave@lemmy.world
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    3 months ago

    Fairness is about being treated fair and having the same opportunities as others. It’s natural to feel sad or envious at the joy of others. That’s life. Is being rewarded for nothing fair too? Putting in literally no effort into being the person others want to spend time with is why no one wants to spend time with you. They put in effort, they try to be the kind of person their partner wants them to be, and their partner loves them for trying. It’s the effort we put into the actions that gives them meaning, that says “I care”.

    • sp3ctr4l@lemmy.zip
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      3 months ago

      Fairness is about being treated fair and having the same opportunities as others. It’s natural to feel sad or envious at the joy of others. That’s life.

      Life is unfair in the sense that people’s opportunities, abilities and experiences vary extremely wildly.

      That is not fairness. It is un fairness.

      Is being rewarded for nothing fair too?

      You mean this in the sense that this person has not tried to cultivate a relationship, but it simultaneously can be read to mean being born into wealth, born into a stable household that fosters strong mental health and sense of self, born into a safe and nurturing environment.

      Lots and lots of people do not have these things have have to work themselves raw, physically and mentally, to the point they do not have the time or energy to pursue a healthy relationship, not that they even know what one looks like.

      You phrase all of this as if the other person just isnt trying hard enough, is not putting in enough effort, when you have no idea how much effort the poster or the happy couple put into anything.

    • This is fine🔥🐶☕🔥@lemmy.world
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      3 months ago

      They put in effort, they try to be the kind of person their partner wants them to be, and their partner loves them for trying.

      You say this but plenty of shitbags are in relationship just because they look hot.

      • Pelicanen@sopuli.xyz
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        3 months ago

        Plenty of shitbags in relationships who aren’t hot as well. People don’t like being lonely and relationships are often sold to us as fixing that loneliness, even when the opposite might be closer to the truth when you’re talking about a bad relationship.