I mean, I still do some stupid and brainless things but I can own that stuff without fear.

The absolute worst is only being able to half-remember most of the stupid shit I did. That stuff still kinda haunts me, but in some ways, that is a necessary evil of sobriety.

This was just a random thought that I needed to write. Maybe it gives someone else something to hope for. Maybe it reminds others of why we choose not to drink. Regardless: IWNDWYT

  • Hobbes_Dent@lemmy.worldEnglish
    21·
    4 months ago

    Thanks for posting.

    I upvote every one of these I see but never know what to say.

    8 years without a drink coming up soon. Keep on keeping on.

  • Zerlyna@lemmy.worldMEnglish
    10·
    4 months ago

    ❤️ I feel you. Waking up and checking the phone to see who I drunk texted was the worst.

    • remoteloveOPEnglish
      9·
      4 months ago

      It took a while for the phone checking reflex to go away with me. On occasion, I’ll still get startled awake, get that sinking feeling in my stomach and make a quick grab for my phone out of panic.

      Even waking up now, not immediately recognizing where I am at or remembering when I fell asleep fills me with a moment of fear about “what happened last night??”.

      Time has fixed most of that, thankfully. I haven’t felt the blood drain from my face in a while and I nearly forgot how that used to be part of my morning routine.

  • JimmyBigSausage@lemm.eeEnglish
    6·
    4 months ago

    Definitely helps to share with someone, whether in confidentiality or in a meeting, being heard and hearing others with similar experiences helps us to stay sober, move forward with our lives and sometimes even laugh about things. You are not alone!

    • remoteloveOPEnglish
      6·
      4 months ago

      Very true. Over the last few weeks, many things have just gone wrong in my life. Some of those things happened by pure chance and some things because of bad choices. It’s annoying for sure, but not horribly bad.

      I think what I was actually saying in my original post, in a roundabout way, is that my life could have been significantly worse at this moment. Simply making a random post and reading a simple response enabled some deeper reflection that was likely past due.

      Thanks for listening/reading. :)

      • cheee@lemmings.worldEnglish
        5·
        4 months ago

        The voice inside that tells us it will be better with alcohol is just so full of fucking bullshit, hey.

        Everything is better without drinking. I know it, experience tells me this without any doubt, if I look back at what I’ve done, all the worst shit, all the worst times, has been fuelled by alcohol.

        I will not drink with you, today. Thanks for sharing your experiences.