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jeffw@lemmy.world to Not The Onion@lemmy.worldEnglish · 1 year ago

Parishioners Report Priest for Saying Jesus Died With Erection

www.thedailybeast.com

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Parishioners Report Priest for Saying Jesus Died With Erection

www.thedailybeast.com

jeffw@lemmy.world to Not The Onion@lemmy.worldEnglish · 1 year ago
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  • cross-posted to:
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Father Thomas McHale was reprimanded but not removed.
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  • MataVatnik@lemmy.world
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    1 year ago

    I mean, if we are going to get technical he probably also shat himself too.

    • MrVilliam@lemmy.world
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      1 year ago

      His last words may have been something akin to “oh fuck, don’t look! Nobody’d better mention this part in my biography!”

      • Agent641@lemmy.world
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        1 year ago

        “Dont put this on the white girl necklace pendants!”

    • intensely_human@lemm.ee
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      1 year ago

      Eloi Eloi, lama sabacthani

  • kakler bitmap@lemmy.world
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    1 year ago

    He is risen

    • FenrirIII@lemmy.world
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      1 year ago

      Jesus was hung on a cross

      • RGB3x3@lemmy.world
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        1 year ago

        Jesus wasn’t hanged, but he sure was hung.

  • Zloubida@lemmy.world
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    Denying that Jesus probably had an erection on the cross is a negation of the human nature of Christ, thus an heresy.

    • gregorum@lemm.ee
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      an heresy

      • intensely_human@lemm.ee
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        1 year ago

        an heresy

        • bingbong@lemmy.dbzer0.com
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          1 year ago

          an heresy

  • eran_morad@lemmy.world
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    2 months ago

    deleted by creator

  • friend_of_satan@lemmy.world
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    And it took him 3 days to rise again, so was probably also suffering from ED.

    • HWK_290@lemmy.world
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      The Res-erection of Christ

  • ryan213
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    Died with an erection or are the parishioners unable to get an erection anymore because Jesus took it away from them??

    • jeffw@lemmy.worldOP
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      It’s a sin to get an erection, so Jesus took the burden and got the hardest cock you’ve ever seen.

      • ryan213
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        No wonder Mary Magdalene (??) got along so well with him.

        • Thaurin@lemmy.world
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          We’re really getting into Game of Thrones territory now…

      • PhineaZ@feddit.de
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        1 year ago

        It’s not about seeing the holy cock, it’s about feeling it

  • Bluefalcon@discuss.tchncs.de
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    1 year ago

    Now that’s a Jesus that can get behind me… I mean I can get behind!

    • SPRUNT@lemmy.world
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      Jesus is a switch?

      • Bluefalcon@discuss.tchncs.de
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        1 year ago

        I am the gate; whoever enters through me will be saved.[a] They will come in and go out, and find pasture. John 10:9

        • Passerby6497@lemmy.world
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          1 year ago

          They will come in and go out,

          Giggidy

      • intensely_human@lemm.ee
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        1 year ago

        Jesus is a checkbox

  • andrew_bidlaw@sh.itjust.works
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    Did he has enough blood to form a bonner?

    • cabron_offsets@lemmy.world
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      • andrew_bidlaw@sh.itjust.works
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        1 year ago

        I can’t see it. Is it a picture?

        • samus12345@lemmy.world
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          1 year ago

        • cabron_offsets@lemmy.world
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          Really short video. Huh, works for me.

          • andrew_bidlaw@sh.itjust.works
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            1 year ago

            That’s on me, probs. All combinations of client\web and regular\VPN show a blank line with no content though. Can you drop a link to what you’ve embedded here?

            • cabron_offsets@lemmy.world
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              1 year ago

              https://getyarn.io/yarn-clip/ce090ef3-b33b-4691-aeb1-9c9ce7325c13

  • Bonehead@kbin.social
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    Angel lust is a common phenomenon. This is not entirely implausible.

  • essell@lemmy.world
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    I think the real question here is whether Jesus died with an erection or died from an erection.

    Did he ride a donkey or ride like a donkey?

    • MxM111@kbin.social
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      I don’t know how to answer your question about the donkey, but the cross was erected.

      • squid_slime@lemm.ee
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        1 year ago

        So Jesus died on an erection?

        • MxM111@kbin.social
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          That’s technically correct.

  • ℕ𝕠𝕓𝕠𝕕𝕪 𝕆𝕗𝕗𝕚𝕔𝕚𝕒𝕝@lemmy.world
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    1 year ago

    flag with erection

  • Starkstruck@lemmy.world
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    1 year ago

    they hated him for speaking the truth

  • I eat words@group.lt
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    This is what you get when are not sleeping during biology classes.

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