• Cruxifux@lemmy.world
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    8 months ago

    People aren’t laughing at you because you’re Christian in Texas you morons, they’re laughing at you because you think you’re being persecuted for your religion when you live somewhere where 80 percent of the population is Christian.

      • This is fine🔥🐶☕🔥@lemmy.world
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        8 months ago

        Once I saw this guy on a bridge about to jump. I said, “Don’t do it!” He said, “Nobody loves me.” I said, “God loves you. Do you believe in God?” He said, “Yes.” I said, “Are you a Christian or a Jew?” He said, “A Christian.” I said, “Me, too! Protestant or Catholic?” He said, “Protestant.” I said, “Me, too! What franchise?” He said, “Baptist.” I said, “Me, too! Northern Baptist or Southern Baptist?” He said, “Northern Baptist.” I said, “Me, too! Northern Conservative Baptist or Northern Liberal Baptist?” He said, “Northern Conservative Baptist.” I said, “Me, too! Northern Conservative Baptist Great Lakes Region, or Northern Conservative Baptist Eastern Region?” He said, “Northern Conservative Baptist Great Lakes Region.” I said, “Me, too! Northern Conservative Baptist Great Lakes Region Council of 1879, or Northern Conservative Baptist Great Lakes Region Council of 1912?” He said, “Northern Conservative Baptist Great Lakes Region Council of 1912.” I said, “Die, heretic!” And I pushed him over.

  • vividspecter@lemm.ee
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    8 months ago

    The most unrealistic part of this is a conservative christian actually reading the bible. Unless he is just using it as a prop which is on form with these types.

      • lars@lemmy.sdf.org
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        8 months ago

        Pretty G-rated compared to the Bible which Fb OP thinks includes only stuff they like in it

        • nilloc@discuss.tchncs.de
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          8 months ago

          Pretty sure these morons only read the illustrated bible for kids versions. With only their favorite fairytales and lots of sweet baby Jesus garbage to make them feel special.

          • lars@lemmy.sdf.org
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            8 months ago

            It must be so hard on them to be vilified and mocked for just doing the right thing. At others.

    • null@slrpnk.net
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      8 months ago

      The second most unrealistic part is the guy on the left holding the phone with his fingers fused together

  • yemmly@lemmy.world
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    8 months ago

    No one hates Christians more than suburban white people in golf shirts. Everyone knows that.

  • callouscomic@lemm.ee
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    8 months ago

    Persecution Fetish.

    It leads them to teach their children that they need to be ready to die for their beliefs. It’s fucked up.

    • madcaesar@lemmy.world
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      8 months ago

      It’s also a religion self-defense. If you tell people early on that their faith will be “tested” they are much harder to reason with because all they are hearing is “Satan is trying to take Jesus away from you” instead of the logical arguments against these made up stories.

  • yesman@lemmy.world
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    8 months ago

    It’s easy to make fun of this, but the sentiment it’s expressing explains so much about how Christians and conservatives in general are motivated.

    The first premise is that conservatives in general are fixated on what’s “normal”. It’s very important to them that they’re in the mainstream and the majority. But they see faces that aren’t like theirs in the media, on the streets, and worst of all in power. Their favorite show expresses values they don’t hold. All the institutions celebrate black history and LGBT pride.

    This is a problem because if what’s normal changes, they’ll have to change to be normal. Or even worse, they’ll be excluded from the normal. This is a threat to their identities.

    This is how I understand irrational Conservative issues like the ‘war on woke’ or the ‘border crisis’. Trump speaks to this fear and anxiety in everything he does. When they say that “he’s come to save us” that’s what they’re talking about.

    • octopus_ink@lemmy.ml
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      8 months ago

      if what’s normal changes, they’ll have to change to be normal. Or even worse, they’ll be excluded from the normal.

      Based on how much time I spend voluntarily associating with any openly conservative family members or coworkers these days (none), my anecdotal evidence is that this is already happening.

      They are bringing it on themselves, but there’s really no point trying to tell them that.

    • Laticauda
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      8 months ago

      Which is ironic because the progressive ideal is to leave the concept of “normal” behind entirely and embrace new different things instead of excluding those who are different.

  • Red_October@lemmy.world
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    8 months ago

    Thing is, they are. Not because they’re Christians (most people don’t care), not because they’re reading the bible (Most of them don’t anyway), but because they post shitty memes like this to feed their victimization fetish.

    • Masterblaster420@lemmy.world
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      8 months ago

      i care that they’re christians. i grew up in the bible belt south in the 80’s. fuck these people. they wanna ruin my life? i’ll gladly return the favor.

    • Echo Dot@feddit.uk
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      8 months ago

      That’s because it’s not worth reading, it’s very derivative and essentially it’s just a rehashing of Life Of Brian anyway.

      • vaultdweller013@sh.itjust.works
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        8 months ago

        Some of it can be interesting to read, but I doubt most people care about how you can see a shift in warfare from bronze over to iron. Or the fact it works as a primitive bit of anthropological history or atleast gives a good look in how the societies writing and translating viewed certain things.

    • OpenStars@startrek.website
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      8 months ago

      It’s got a lot of good stuff. Like, “the worker deserves their wages”, no wait let’s throw that out, and “take care of the poor & needy”, no let’s ditch that too, and “your breasts are fiiiiine gurl”, no wait let’s never read that out loud ever, anywhere.

      My favorite is “be skeptical - test everything”, oh no wait no let’s redact that too… (I just realized how that doesn’t mesh with the most important verse of all: “just do whatever we tell you, no questions asked, capiche?”)

      The hilarious part is not that they are reading the Bible - it is that they are not! Likewise for the Constitution that they showed up on January 6th to “defend”.

      • fsxylo@sh.itjust.works
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        8 months ago

        “Of course we read the Constitution! It says “we the people”! Well, we’re people, and everyone else isn’t! Just like God intended!”

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          8 months ago

          “Well-regulated militia” - oh wait no, forget that part, it’s impossible to allow any kind of regulation at all.

          “You can impeach someone for criminal offenses” - oh wait no let’s ditch that one too…

          No wait, I want it back again!

          I also want back the 3/5ths of a person thing, but let’s expand that to also include anyone with a college degree or lives in a city, suburb, or even those in rural areas who don’t support their local Republican church strongly enough.

          “One rule for me, while the polar opposite rule for thee” - it’s not hard to understand in the slightest. We all played these games as toddlers, the difference being that some of us allowed ourselves to grow up. :-|

    • Spacehooks@reddthat.com
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      8 months ago

      My SO grandma reads Bible explanation books. Stuff is wild I read some and it talks about aliens and dimension compacting and all kinds of sci-fi stuff but packaged in a very weird way.

    • RGB3x3@lemmy.world
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      8 months ago

      Nobody does. But I’ve seen plenty of people who walk around with them to pretend that they do.

    • shikitohno@lemmy.world
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      8 months ago

      I read it out of spite because of how often any random nonsense in my high school English class would be call a metaphor for Jesus and I wanted to be able to call BS on it when appropriate.

      Suggested to my mother that she might want to read it sometime, seeing as she taught catechism classes for the local church and she gave me the most confused look and asked me why on earth she would want to do that. The very same lady who insisted I had to continue attending mass and catechism classes until I got confirmed right up until the nun in charge expelled me from their catechism program.

      • kofe@lemmy.world
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        8 months ago

        I’m taking a Jewish studies course where we’ve compared verses to other historical artifacts. It really is pretty interesting how much everyone wanted to claim “my daddy God will (or did) beat up yours!”

  • LillyPip
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    8 months ago

    Yeah. We are laughing at them. It’s their own fault for being laughable.

    They’ve been doing far, far worse to everyone else for thousands of years, so a bit of online snickering shouldn’t hurt them. Like witch trials, the inquisition, the crusades, the holocaust, lynchings – that’s all fine, but their god forbid we make a few jokes online… that’s too far.

    Lol Prudence, fucking suck it up.

  • PrincessLeiasCat@sh.itjust.works
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    8 months ago

    From someone who lives in this shithole: this has never happened except for maybe a few times on a super edgy atheist subreddit for teenagers.

    No white Christian dude in Texas has ever experienced this. We get it, bro. You’re the victim. You and every other Jesus-loving white guy in office right now, passing laws to take away the rights of anyone not like you. Even if this did happen, you’re all victims because a few guys laughed at you while you read your sacred book.

    How did you ever move on from this moment?

    • ObsidianZed@lemmy.world
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      8 months ago

      Not in Texas but Oklahoma, and I grew up “Christian” and there was definitely one asshole in high school that just wanted to be that atheist asshole. Like obnoxiously mocking. anyone that mentioned anything about religion.

      I’m pretty non religious now and heard that he has since ‘found religion’ but also believed the COVID vaccine was a government conspiracy. So tables have turned a bit there, or maybe he’s just dumb.

      • captainlezbian@lemmy.world
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        8 months ago

        I knew those people too. It’s funny because I was the Christian they mocked at the time, but I’ve grown and went through time as an atheist, and am now pagan. For some people I think religious identity is primarily a tool to ensure they feel superior or enlightened, whereas for others it’s a search for an inner or outer truth or something else deep and private, and for others still it’s cultural or just “I don’t buy it”.

        It’s easy for all of us to misunderstand each other when often our why is more significant than the conclusion we reach (per my observations). The people who want to feel superior are going to find people they agree with and gloat. The seekers are going to pursue understanding and self mastery. And the others are not going to understand why all of us care so much outside of transitional periods of belief.

  • ItsAFake@lemmus.org
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    8 months ago

    They’re not laughing at him for reading the bible, they’re laughing at him dressing up to go on a plane like it’s the 1950s, fuckin nerd.