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The Picard Maneuver@startrek.website to The Onion@midwest.socialEnglish · 2 years ago

Everyone Witnessing Second Coming Just Going To Pretend They Already Knew Jesus Christ Had Crab Claws For Hands

www.theonion.com

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Everyone Witnessing Second Coming Just Going To Pretend They Already Knew Jesus Christ Had Crab Claws For Hands

www.theonion.com

The Picard Maneuver@startrek.website to The Onion@midwest.socialEnglish · 2 years ago
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JERUSALEM—Struggling not to betray their surprise at the large, crustacean-like appendages being waved around by the Son of God, people currently witnessing the Second Coming were apparently just going to pretend they already knew Jesus had crab claws for hands, sources reported Friday. “Nobody wants to bring it up,…
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  • CobblerScholar@lemmy.world
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    2 years ago

    • The Picard Maneuver@startrek.websiteOP
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      2 years ago

      …I have never seen a more perfect use of this

    • Norgur@kbin.social
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      2 years ago

      I came here wishing for this to be here. Wasn’t disappointed!
      Woowooowooowoooowooo

  • CarbonIceDragon@pawb.social
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    2 years ago

    Carcinization strikes again

  • Riccosuave@lemmy.world
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    2 years ago

  • MajorHavoc@lemmy.world
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    2 years ago

    As the saying goes, “Jesus saves, but Evolution really just loves making new kinds of crabs.”

  • ehxor
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    2 years ago

    Why not Zoidberg?

  • negativenull@startrek.website
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    2 years ago

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