So, I’m just assuming we’ve all seen the discussions about the bear.
Personally I feel that this is an opportunity for everyone to stop and think a little about it.
The knee-jerk reaction from many men seems to be something along the lines of “You would choose a dangerous animal over me? That makes me feel bad about myself.” which results in endless comments of the “Akchully… according to Bayes theorem you are much more likely to…” kind.
It should be clear by now that it doesn’t lead to good places.
Maybe, and I’m open to being wrong, but maybe the real message is women saying: “We are scared of unknown men.”
Then, if that is the message intended, what do we do next? Maybe the best thing is just to listen. To ask questions. What have you experienced to make you feel that way?
I firmly believe that the empathy we give lays a foundation for other people being willing to have empathy for the things we try to communicate.
It doesn’t mean we should feel bad about ourselves, but just to recognize that someone is trying to say something, and it’s not a technical discussion about bears.
What do you think?
Bluntly, I wouldn’t want to have some lady I’ve never met, trapped in the forest with me either. Not because I’m a bad person, far from it.
I feel like I’d be rather handy if I was lost in a forest, but she wouldn’t know that.
Fact is, any lady weighing in on the discussion doesn’t have any reasonable guarantee or even a reasonable probability of getting someone half as helpful as me, and a nontrivial chance of getting a date rapist, so I get it. The worst that a bear would do is kill and eat them, and if they’re lucky, it’ll happen in that order. There are fates worse than death.
I don’t take any offense at someone answering “bear”. At all. It’s an age old question, of the devil that you know, versus the devil that you don’t. Sure, there’s a non-zero chance you’ll end up in the woods with bear grylls (or someone with a similar skillset), or Mr. Rogers (or similarly kind person), but the far more likely scenario is not that.
It’s not a statement against me personally as a male, it’s a statement about the average man. If that offends you, there’s a good chance that you’re part of the problem.
I’m not here to judge. So I’ll let you decide for yourself.
The fact is, unknown men is basically a gamble most aren’t willing to make. What can we do about it? Probably somewhere between Jack and squat. Unless we can “fix” the socially inept and creepy men, as well as the rapists, would-be (opportunistic) rapists, date rapists, and just all around shitty men, pretty much all at once, this stereotype isn’t going anywhere. Just be the change you want to see in the world, and try to encourage your brothers to be better.