I’m gay. I’m agender, and I like enbies better than men and women.
The other day in an argument I got frustrated with someone and told them to call me a homophobic slur. One part sarcasm, one part hoping they’d actually do it and get in trouble. Instead, I got punished for using the word. I wasn’t expecting that, because I’m gay. If I call myself a f-----, I didn’t think that was anyone else’s problem.
Was I right? Is it okay for me to use that word, talking about myself?
Personally I think anyone trying to “reclaim” a slur is an ignoramus. Not everyone agrees with the use of those words in any context so it doesn’t matter if you are “card carrying”, it still doesn’t make it okay to say in mixed company where you don’t know how that word will impact those present.
I have seen this in action numerous times with different groups where someone catches a beating for dropping a slur even though they were “allowed” to say it.