How did this western societal idea of how a man should act, and what emotions are appropriate to show come about? How far back in western history does this idea of limiting men’s ability to emote honestly go? And how did these ideas change over time?
It’s interesting to me because I feel like these traditional and limited roles that western society puts on men (and women) are just that traditions. That it’s just something “that we do because past generations did them.” So my curiosity is why did past generations have these societal rules in place? was there a legitimate reason for it, did having men be almost robotic even in the privacy of his home and around his family have some necessary and important reason? If so is that still necessary today?
Edit: had this posted on c/asklemmy but it was suggested this was a better place for this question.
Thanks for posting this. I am 4th gen since my family (i.e. great grandfather) served in a war.
I think generations that have not gone through war have a hard time recognizing war-induced inter-generational trauma, since it’s often the case that men who went through that hell didn’t want to bring it home and talk about it, for various reasons (e.g. PTSD, shame, thoughtfulness).
Their behaviors might have caused kids and grand-kids to suffer (e.g. physical abuse, emotional abuse), but those kids might not understand why their dad, grandpa, etc. behaved the way he did, so maybe the source of the problem gets buried and forgotten.
Yes, your description is part of the genesis of my question. Where did this all come from because without knowing the origin of why western culture stared disallowing some important and strong emotions to be displayed by men we can strive to change it.